Here I am at the start of another work week. I thoroughly enjoyed my weekend. The time spent with my mother yesterday was beautiful beyond measure. She was so happy to have me accompany her at church. She spent about an hour and a half introducing me to all the people she knew and had spoken to about me. In a way I felt bad, because I had missed out on so much not going to church for the past year and a half. So many new faces and so many old faces that just lit up when I walked in the building. I didn't promise my mother the next time I'd be back, but I do plan on visiting again. After church we went out to eat at my favorite restaurant that we'd plan to go to for so long, but never got a chance to make it. We enjoyed a couple smoked apple martinis and feasted on our crusted Parmesan chicken breast with cheesy mashed potatoes and broccoli. Dinner was great! I think my mother got a little loose after that second martini, because she started to talk to me about men and relationships. This is something we NEVER talk about. My family is pretty private and our private lives is something we just don't discuss. People always ask me if my mother knows about my sexuality and I always say no, because she never asked. My being a lesbian is not something that I'm hiding, it's just the simple fact that it's my business and I don't feel the need in going around broadcasting it.

Aside from relationships, my mother commented on how proud of me she was for holding my own and being an independent young woman. It made me think of all the women on her side of the family, none of them have been dependent on a man before. They are all strong women that take care of home themselves. My mother has my dad, but she has made is clear that she doesn't need him to live her life. I was blessed with those same traits and I am thankful for them. I know so many girls and women my age who can't stand to live without a man or woman. They always have to be in a relationship to feel some type of security. They are never secure by themselves. I decided a long time ago that I would never depend on a man for anything. I would always love and take care of myself. So far, that's what I've been doing and I'm loving every minute of it. I've had my time where I did feel the need to be validated by a man or woman. I got out of that stage in life, thank goodness! My past relationships didn't work out for various reasons, but one of those reasons were that none of them seemed to be able to think straight. No offense to any of them reading, but sometimes I questioned if their head were attached to their bodies. Each one of them reminded me of why I need to just depend on myself and that life is better off with just me. I do desire to have a mate, but I desire a mate that is able to think for herself and make logical choices in life. Understand that her character is what makes her a whole. Have common sense and think! This brings me to this week's quote by Ayn Rand:

"That which you call your soul or spirit is your consciousness, and that which you call 'free will' is your mind's freedom to think or not, the only will you have, your only freedom, the choice that controls all the choices you make and determines your life and your character." - Ayn Rand, "Atlas Shrugged"

Our mental is literally our only sense of freedom. I have to bring up the common sense factor again; this is a MUST HAVE! If you don't have sensible thoughts, how can you make sensible choices. Without sense, your character is basically a waste of space. What are you here for? We were equipped with a tool called a brain and it is so sad that most people don't use it. So I definitely desire a mate that recognizes their free will to think and understands that their choices is what determines their future and character.