I Put Off
Well Friday is finally here! That means a nice 3 day weekend! I was so looking forward to this. I still have my vacation time to look forward to as well. Can't wait. It's Ms. Kisses birthday weekend. She doesn't want to do anything. She sucks, I swear, loll. I don't blame her though. We both aren't big on surprise parties and too much attention. So we will probably go out to a nice little club with a good atmosphere. It's so hard to find a nice gay club out here in Houston. Either they are non existent or they are filled with kids that are only gay, because their friend is gay. It sucks. I just want to go to a nice gay hang out, where it isn't too much shoot em' up kill em' music, children, or even 70 yr old lesbians. Now that I think about it; are their any normal gays in Houston that aren't in hiding? Hm, I'll have to do some research on that one.



Aquarius - August 29, 2008


The house might seem rather empty today, dear Aquarius, as most of the other members of your household are probably out and about. This is, however, a good time for you to take care of some projects of your own that you've been putting off. They might be tedious and rather boring, but think of how good you'll feel when they're finally done! In the evening, you might entertain some visitors. Enjoy your day.


Well this weekend I plan to do some cleaning. Go to the store and buy a crap load of cleaning supplies and clean my ass off. It's time that I do so. I can't stand doing it, so I put it off. My apartment isn't filthy or anything, being that I can't sleep in filth or if anything is out of place; I just know I need to give some special attention to some things. I am SO not looking forward to it. I know someone who cleans everyday as if Obama and his family are coming over for dinner. Ugh! I don't see how she does it. Maybe she has an OCD. *Smiles*


This week was pretty long for me. Work is really kicking my ass, but it's the end of the month so all is to be expected. We lose a day of work, because of the holiday. So I'm bitter sweet about having Monday off. I'm busting my ass today to get a lot of stuff done, because all of my deadlines have to be met by the 3rd. Sucks major ass. I really need to hit the lotto, trick some ho's, rob a bank or something; this just isn't cutting it. Got paid today and then turned around and dished all my money out towards rent and bills. We work for the man and then in turn give back to the man. *Slits writs* Ugh! I don't even want to think about it.




I learned a lot about communication this week . I realize that alot of the time when anger overpowers our other emotions, we lose our sense of hearing. We no longer hear the cries of the ones who are trying to communicate with us. In fact, we don't even want to hear them. It is at that very moment, you drown yourself in your own pool of emotions. You see or hear nothing else but what you feel. Your point becomes the only point that should be getting across. It is no longer who is at fault, because both parties aren't listening. You sit and you become angrier because you THINK the right things aren't being said. Oh but they are. No one is listening though. There has been a wall built up in between the two of you and each punch that is taken is only felt by you. You're becoming more numb by the second, until you can't feel anything. Then you sit in silence. No more words are said and no more punches are thrown. The only thing you hear is your own heartbeat slowing down to it's normal pace. The anger is dissolving and that wall is crumbling. This is when your senses come back. You begin to speak as the other person listens and you can see all of the damage that both of you have done. This is where the choices have to be made. And whatever you choose, it's okay, because there is not understanding. Communication is all that was needed. It's all that is ever needed. But when one stops listening the other will soon follow suit. Blah, blah, blah. It usually all happens again and again and again anyway. The fact of the matter is; people change when it's convenient. It's hardly ever permanent.


Well, lunch time is over! I hope everyone has a dope weekend, stays safe and has fun! Lots of fun! Oh and man fuck these hurricanes man. Dodge it if you can.



This is nice. It really is. I never thought I'd see it happen in my lifetime. However, it scares me shitless. My mind state on this whole thing is so much more different than that of the average American.

The Backstabbers
"They smile in your face. All the while they want to take your place. The backstabbers."


We all know some. We've been involuntarily drug into the tangled web of deceit spun by them. They grin from ear to ear in front of your face, but behind your back; they're dogging you out. They are running to people that you know trying to demote you in anyway possible. They are NOT voting for you and they are not apart of your campaign. They are the MOLE, America's Player and the weakest link. Man oh man.

Why do people stab you in the back though? I mean if you think about it; this person has to be full of fear. We already know that they are angry and jealous, because you are doing something with your life that they cannot do. That has to suck, I'm sure. I mean being incompetent is never a good thing. It's like having erectile dysfunction and you're trying to get your groove back. Ya just ain't got it. So you start to hate the person that does have it. You run your own campaign against that person. You start to spread rumors about that person to people that are close to them. You come up with all sorts of lies to make this person look bad. You take your unproven assumptions and you blow them up. Oh you've got them now; or so you think. However the joke is still on you. You still are incompetent and can't get it up. Oh don't get it twisted though; you're fucking. You're just fucking yourself.

Apparently, I've become famous online. My name is in all types of false and fabricated stories. I understand how pathetic people's lives truly are, but damn do you have to take me down with you? I know the answer to that; yes you do. I know, I know. It's okay. You have nothing else better to do than to jump into instant messages with people that you see close to me and try to throw me under the bus. Gosh, I'm flattered and all, but your attempts are not working. The people you are trying to persuade are not buying your lies. Oh but wait, you make sure to smile in my face though. You make sure to pretend like everything is all good between you and I. You're reading this blog as we speak and you know I'm talking about you, but you're going to play it off as if this is not your character that I'm dissecting. What's that called? Oh, denial.

Well, I guess I will declare this as another victory. I've done something in my life that has lit the fire under someone else's ass. People are making moves all in the name of me. Tamica Nicole. I love it! I'll keep doing what it is that I do, so you can keep up the work in following me. Keep my name on your lips and running off your fingertips. Having my ego stroked always feels good. Give me some more baby!


Tamica Nicole for President! Campaign on that haters.
I Miss...
I snagged this from The Dreamy One. I thought it was a nice blog idea, and so did she; since she snagged it from someone else, loll.

I miss…

- My mom telling me not to go around the corner while riding my bike on a Saturday afternoon.

- Jumping in my bed during the middle of the night when I couldn't sleep.

- Going to the skating ring every Friday and buying pickles so big, we had to eat them with two hands.

- Sitting next to my bestfriend during church and passing notes back and forth.

- Playing pencil break.

-Taking school pictures and stealing the little combs provided by the photographers.

- Collecting rocks from the school playground.

- Watching old VHS tapes at my cousins house and waiting for my Aunt to finish her homemade french fries.

- Hugging my big brother.

- Playing games with my niece and nephew.

- Going to my old church.

- The long lunch break during the all day; 3 day bible conventions.

- Collecting movie ticket stubs.

- Going to class.

- Doing homework.

- My mama's home cooked meals.

- My parents telling me to clean my room.

- Talking on the phone with my cousin for hours about video games.

- Writing my first boyfriends name on every single paper I could get my hands on.

- Splash Friday

- Dragging my mom to the neighborhood pool and telling her "just 5 more minutes"

- Basketball practice

- My first car.

- Slamming my book down on the desk when my old history teacher use to fall asleep in mid sentence.

- Paris Coffee and Tenkia Carter; we were 3 da hard way.

- Anticipating my high school graduation.

- Being loved unconditionally.

- Going out on a real date.

- Having sex with strings attached. I miss actually feeling something.

- Writing poetry recited from the heart and not the mind.

- Another Bad Creation

- Fame City

- Astroworld and Waterworld

- Discovery Zone

- Childhood

- Not having a worry in the world.

Whewwww this list can go on and on. I enjoyed writing this very much. I actually dropped a few tears, because I realize how much things have changed in my life and how far I have come.

What do you miss??
College Wednesday - Know Somebody Like This?
My lunch hour is actually over, so I'm going to rush this one. So fuck the introduction. This is College Wednesday and ya'll know what we do here. This week we reveal Just "One Of The Guys" Girl and The Karaoke Superstar.





Just "One Of The Guys" Girl - She is always hanging out with the guys and may not have a lot of female friends to hang with on a day to day basis. Tries her hardest to fit in with the boys by playing video games, burping, commenting about the "hott" girls (and why they aren't good enough), takes part in random mischief ect. She is always there to give relationship advice, and is usually friends with all of the guys girlfriends.

Can we say on the verge of becoming a lesbian? Either that or this girl is having a major identity crisis. Then again, I do know a few women who just don’t like to hang out with other females. Shit we all know how emotionally unstable and dramatic females can be. That's one reason why I don't hang around a lot of females either. There was a time period when all I hung out with was guys as well. But I didn't fit in with the females, because I was to tomboyish and we just didn't have anything in common. I hadn't came out yet and I was just downright confused, loll. The guys took me underneath their arms and we were all thick as thieves. They were totally comfortable in front of me. I gave them advice about their women and their women were fine with me always being around their men. Hell, I didn't want them anyway, loll. When I finally did come out, the guys were cool with it. A couple of them tried to convince me to do a threesome, but that was to be expected. It felt like they tried to look after me even more so than. I miss my boys, too bad they all got knocked.



Karaoke Superstar - Possessing the incredible ability of knowing the lyrics to every song ever written, but unfortunately lacking the talent to flaunt it properly. The Karaoke Superstar molds every moment of their life into that of an American Idol reject. Whether it be wailing along to their favorite Nickelback song at the bar, or belting out Phil Collins in the dorm shower at 8 in the morning. The Karaoke Superstar fails to hit the right notes every time. Those in earshot will reel in horror at the audio assault, exclaiming, "Oh my God, a cat fell into the blender!" or "It sounds like someone is scraping a cheese grater across a 200 feet blackboard!". The Karaoke Superstar falls under the category of "completely ignorant", believing their vocal styling to be those of a professional. Frequently an actual Music major, mentioning their shortcomings will result in a major blow their ego.

ROFLMAO!!! Uh, you hate to be a bubble buster, you really do, but it's these people that you do NOT feel sorry for when Simon rips them a new asshole on American Idol. These people can hear themselves. They know what they sound like. They should be embarrassed to even attempt to hum. But noooooo, these are the people always the first in line at the Karaoke bar. Fucking up the entire Karaoke experience for everyone in attendance. There are times when it's cute at and can be taken as a joke. Then there are times when it dawns on you that this person is serious. They really think they can sing. Then….there are times when it's life threatening. Everyone in earshot drops dead. Google it; I'm not kidding.

Welp, that was great. I have to go now. Peace.

Another T.K.O

I can't believe it's only Wednesday. I swear when I woke up this morning, LATE, I thought it was Friday. I still have 2 days to get out this muthafucka. So far this week has been a wreck less one for me emotionally. I've added that steel layer around my heart again after having it bruised over the weekend. Usually when I add that steel layer; I feel like I'm trapped into a corner. When I come out of that corner, I come out swinging. I hit everything moving. It's not a good thing man. I attack verbally and I take no prisoners.

This is when I become irrational and there isn't much that can be said to soften my heart again. I seek revenge and I aim to hurt. When the smoke clears and all of my damage has been done; I'm left the only one standing with the bloody knife in my hand. I leave the scene without a trace and continue on in my life's journey. Sometimes depending on the situation I may hear the faint voices of my conscience telling me to go back. Telling me that I need to apologize for my actions. Telling me that I should have done this or asking me why I didn't do that? Sometimes I hate my fucking conscience and I just want it to shut the fuck up.

Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Aquarius (Jan 20 - Feb 18)

Something has been bugging you and it's not going to disappear until you tackle it head-on. The problem is that you may not know where your emotional discomfort is coming from. There may be unresolved issues about how you handle yourself in a power struggle that need your attention. Don't blame others for your current intensity. Take responsibility for your perspective and communicate it appropriately.

Blaming other people for the way I handle things is not something I do. That would be a major contradiction. I we all have our limits. We all have that point where we have to either step up to the plate and bring it all to an end before we blow up. But what if you've stepped up to that plate a thousand times and no one heard you? What if everything you voiced was ignored? So you shut up and try your best to let everything roll off. You try that whole acceptance thing. Then pulls out that big tub of butter cream icing and lays the smack down all over your cake. That's it. This is your breaking point. This is when you are truly done! Stick a fork in that cake. You say things, you do things; not really concerned about the outcome of it all. You no longer give a fuck.

All of your cards were played. You tried to communicate on numerous occasions. What left is there to do? So you start to communicate in a way that you know they'll hear you. You start to speak their language. Not a good move, because now you've stooped to their level. Tsk, tsk, tsk. Oh well. You do what you have to do and then it's all over. Ego's are bruised, embarrassment has set in, hearts have been broken and all the cards have been pulled. This is what you wanted right? You feel good about it too. The people who are truly your friends, love you and know you will support your ass, because they know all of the failed attempts you went through before hand. So along with the faint voices of your conscious you have your friends saying "oh well, that bitch had it coming anyway."

My perspective is the way that I see things in the picture I've painted behind my own eyes. Part of me wants to feel bad for the way I handled things, but the other part of me is smiling from ear to ear for the simple fact that I have control over my emotions again. I almost lost myself in something that God was trying to pull me away from. It's funny how things play out when something just isn't meant to be. It's all dust off my shoulders and once again I am the last woman standing. Another TKO.
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Mica Loves The Kids????
Everyone who knows me understands my sentiments on kids. I can't stand them ya'll. However they love to be around me if I accidently end up in the same vicinity of them. And it's not like I'm super sweet to them either. Maybe they take me being mean and grouchy as comedy. Who knows? It's always like that. *Sigh*

My friend who use to work at the same company as I brought her 9 month old son up to the office to visit. I remember when she was pregnant and she use to ask me everyday, "Tamica are you SURE you don't want any kids?" She did it to irritate me for her own sick pleasures, loll. Elijah is so cute though. I was happy to see my friend and when I saw the little bugger I couldn't help but to smile. He is a very happy baby. He kept laughing and tried to feed me slobbered down crackers. Ugh. I let him sit in my seat and do some of my work…which ended up in him damn near crashing the computer. Smh.








I can't like some kids are cute. But I think they are at their cutest when they are sleeping and just for the simple fact that THEY AREN'T MINE! Omg, I would SO be an unfit mother. I'm surprised my niece and nephew survived their first summer with me. Boy did we struggle! I was reading a blog earlier about marriage and I've never dreamed of a big wedding. Married with kids, ha! Fuck no, that's not for me. I think it's a beautiful thing, when it works and two people succeed at it. Don't get me wrong. But for Tamica Nicole, I'll pass. People keep saying that I'm only 24 and I'll change my mind. Well I'm a woman who is very stuck in here ways. I've had the same "I wanna barf" attitude about it as far back as I can remember and it hasn't changed yet. Who knows though, maybe people are right. By the time I'm 30 I'll be married with 3 kids and dog.

This is so surreal! Me, a man, and some kids?! GTFO! Bring on the turkey baster, because this is NOT how it's going down!
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Give It Up For Ma Kisses!!!!!!
I am on edge today and in a serious bitch mode; so I opted not to post anything today. However, I had to introduce someone to you guys. This woman has been here with me for quite some time. I've been knowing her for a very long time. Although we've had our fair share of disagreements and fall outs; in my heart she is my greatest friend. She's my damn sanity ya'll and the best part of my damn day. She's always been a devoted reader of mine and is not afraid to give her honest opinion. So with all of that said everyone meet. Ms. Kisses!


Ya'll check out her blogs. If you want it raw, heartfelt, humorous and downright honest; peep this little lady here. UrbaneKisses (click the link). Tell her I sent you!

Social Suicide
Man, I had one hell of a weekend. Even though I'm tired come Monday morning, I do enjoy experiencing two fun filled days. I didn't go to work this weekend, as I should have; instead I stayed at home. Blah. Anyway, I'll pay for the consequences of that later. After hanging out with my friends and doing things that we use to do back in the day; I came to a few revelations this weekend. The most important one is that having a social life is very healthy and it maintains your youth.

Monday, August 25, 2008

Aquarius (Jan 20 - Feb 18)

You are not overly excited about working too much today, especially if your heart is set on creating time to kick back and relax. If you are presented with the opportunity of teaching or otherwise playing with youngsters, don't hesitate to say "yes". And in the meantime, keep up the fun activities with your friends.


Sometimes I get so involved in my life's responsibilities that I forget to have fun. I convince myself that I don't have time to goof around or take a break. I will go months cancelling on my friends with outings, drinks, parties or just hanging out. I would rather stay inside my apartment; reading blogs, writing blogs, watching DVDs or chatting on AOL. LAME, LAME, LAME! Well, let me take the blog part back, because I truly do enjoy reading and writing blogs; fuck what anybody thinks about that.

I'm young, confident, focused and single! I have no reason not to be having fun. I am an extreme home body, but I don't want to become older and be stuck in my house miserable. I live in a big city with a lot to do and yeah I have two jobs, but it's still no excuse to commit social suicide. People have been asking for quite some time "where have you been?", "is Mica still alive", "why don't you chill with us anymore?" Welp…Mica is back people. I'm going to start hitting the Houston scene again. My friend network is confidently secure again and I'm still extremely happy with my life. I took whatever time I needed to take to re-evaluate myself and seek the reasons why I have had so many clashes with people in my past. Now that I have my solutions and have redirected my mindset on the human species; I must get back on the road.

So to all my friends whom I hung out with this weekend, thanks for not ditching me totally, loll. We will have many more weekends to come like the one we just had.
???

Normally I don’t blog on Saturdays, but I use the time that I do have to try to catch up on all of my favorite blogs to read. However today I feel a little indifferent. My senses are intensified and I feel like I have something remarkable to share with the world and I just don’t know what it is. I just got off the phone with a really good friend of mine whom I haven’t spoken with in about a month now. The very last conversation that we had prior to the one today was ended on a bad not in my behalf. It just led me to believe that things can change so much in over a small amount of time. I mean I look back over these past four weeks and I seem to have a whole new perspective on life. I haven’t had any traumatic event take place in my life or anything like that, but I just feel different. And it feels good.

Aquarius - August 23, 2008
Things may seem a bit surreal for you today, dear Aquarius, so don't take other people's chatter too seriously. Today is a day to reach out and touch someone. Pick up the phone and dial it. It is a good day to share your dreams with others, despite how far-fetched they may sound. Others may look at you as if you have three heads, but as long as you are being honest with yourself, there is no reason for you to be shy about sharing.

So when I was talking to my friend and catching up on what’s been going in with here over these weeks; it’s revealed that her and her baby were in the hospital for a couple days. Both she and her baby are just fine and I am thankful of that. Sometimes when you listen to someone explain an experience that they’ve gone through, it humbles you in some way.

I am standing here on a podium in front of a billion people and I am trying to find the words to express this indescribable feeling. There is a question mark on everyone’s face and I am the only person on earth with the answer to this mystery question. I wonder what this means. I was talking to the love of my life today who also happens to be an Aquarius and she shared with me the best way she could the surreal feelings that she felt when she woke up this morning. That is weird within itself, having someone you adore share with you the EXACT feelings that you’re feeling. I get tingles down my spine every time I think about that.

I’m in rare form today and I will be back later when I figure out how to digest these indescribable feelings.

To be continued…
I Got 5 On It! - Survey
I got this short survey from Eb. Ya'll know I love doing these things. I love reading them even more, so I hope some of you post your answers as well.

1. What is your favorite song to have sex to?

Maxwell - Sumthin' Sumthin' (Mellosmooth Remix)
From the Love Jones Soundtrack




2. What is your drag name?


Probably "Nookie". People call me that anyway. T. Nookie baby!!

3. In the film made of your life, who will play you?

I would have to say Da Brat, because it's no secret that I am a tomboy and a lesbian. I love the fact that she is versatile and can look good either tomboyish or feminine. Yeah baby I rock both sides! Making me an awesome me! One of a kind! Oh and plus she's hot!!!

OR


Shane (Kathering Moeing) from The L Word. This girl has HELLA swagger. She's no lipstick lesbian, but she sure does bang a lot of them! I love this woman. Although she's the wrong skin tone, I think she'd play an awesome ME. Which can be good or bad, loll. Depending on how you look at it.

OR


Queen Latifah!! Another versatile woman. I love her in anything she plays in. Well, I'm lying, because she's played in some wack shit. However, I'd give her a shot at playing me.

OR




Ellen! She's hilarious and her style is impeccable. Who doesn't love Ellen? Say you don't and I'll shoot cha! Ellen gets "hyphy" and I love her!


4. What is one thing that you would change about yourself?



Ugh. Need I say more. Somebody sign me up for the nearest 24 hour fitness with the quickness. 2009 is all I can say. Fuck starting now, I need at least 6 months to mentally prepare. May the force be with me!


5. What's your status message on your preferred networking site?

I don't get on Facebook much. So my status message says "what are you doing now?"


The status message on my Myspace says: "She word hustles is mad that she won't get to see her niece and nephew this summer. Or so it seems". I haven't updated this status in ages either. I guess my Myspace game fell off!! Ah well.

Bring on the next survey! I love doing these!

I Might Get "Hyphy"

Hyphy is a word I learned just recently from my "lady friend" (sorry babe). Of course she is from California, because we don’t say shit like that down here in Texas. The first time she told me not to get "hyphy" with her, I had to stop talking, because I didn't know what the hell she just said to me. I was at a loss for words. I've never understood most of the things that Californians said, especially E-40. So of course I looked the word up, because I was wondering how does one get hyphy. I mean I used my context clues, but I needed a solid definition. Of course Wikipedia would inform me of such tomfoolery.

"An individual is said to "get hyphy" when they act or dance in an overstated, fast paced, and ridiculous manner."

"Those who consider themselves part of the Hyphy movement would describe this behavior as "getting stupid" or "going dumb.""

"In contrast to much of popular American culture where these phrases would be considered negative or even insulting, Hyphy is distinguished by taking this kind of behavior as a form of pride."

With the way I am feeling today, I just might have to get "hyphy". I am go glad it's Friday though. I'm cramping like a muthafucka and I just want to crawl up under my sheets and watch The L Word. I don't feel like "ghost riding the whip" (definite way to run yourself over with your own car) today.

Aquarius - August 22, 200

8It may be necessary for you to stand up for yourself today, dear Aquarius. Don't hesitate to get aggressive with someone if this is what it takes to get through to him or her. Just make sure that you are basing your action on facts that you know to be true. The reality of the situation could be a bit clouded, so make sure you proceed with care. There is an electric energy in the air that will help fuel your fire.


It probably would been smart to take the evening off from Comcast today, but I have some vacation time coming up next month that I'm totally stoked about. I need it. Anyway, I plan to pray away such feelings no matter what I encounter today. I feel bad right now, because my friend asked me to go to the club with her tonight, and I REALLY don't want to. I know I have plans to have a movie night with some other friends tonight as well, but I feel bad about not hooking up with Regina. I miss my friend and I just told her on our lunch date earlier this week that we had to start hanging out more. Here she is trying to make arrangements for us to do so, and I can't and don't want to go. If only she didn't want to always go to the club. I am SO over the club scene. Seriously. Congregating with a bunch of promiscuous lesbians just makes my skin crawl now days. I'll pass. I hope she understands. Hope I don't have to get "hyphy" with her, loll.

So I'm going to lay low this weekend. Go to work and probably chill out at the parents house. I may ride out with my sister to see her new place. Yes man, she got a place! She met her deadline of August 31st. She'll be out on the 29th. Go sis! I'm proud of her. She did what she had to do and got her shit together. So maybe we'll go see if we can get her furniture out of storage. Other than that, I'm staying inside. I'm going into Vampire Mode. I hope everyone has a great weekend.
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Black Magic
"Sticks and stones may break my bones, but word will never hurt me!" This is a damn lie. Words are the most powerful weapons humans are equipped with. Sometimes the thing we say to people; especially those we love, can cause them to alter their lives in a negative way. Say for instance, if at a very young age you love to sing and this is all you do around the house. That is until your mother or father comes home one night extremely tired from work. They mean no harm, but they are tired and cranky. In this state they quickly to tell you to shut up and that your voice is annoying the hell out of them. They tell you that you don't sound good and to go to your room. You then may never sing again, because you think that your voice will annoy everyone that hears it. You become shy when asked to sing a song and you're pulled down, because of what was said by your tired mother or father. It's called Black Magic.

We all are magicians. Some of us mean no harm, and some are just down right vindictive and will throw verbal daggers at you just to pull you down purposely. Words are more magical when they are coming out of the mouths of family, friends, or lovers. You expect these people to be delicate with your feelings and to support you 100%. We all know that sometimes even these people can be your worse enemies. Some of our closest friends in life are only here to watch you fall down. Sad huh? Goodness, I hope I don't have any friends in my life like that right now. You never know though. I don’t put anything past anyone now days. These close ones will study you, listen to you and memorize your every button. They will go out of their way to push those buttons that they know for a fact will slow you down in some way. Man oh man; that's that Black Magic.


Aquarius - August 21, 2008

There is no tolerance for laziness today, dear Aquarius. Get up and get moving. You may feel like you are in a mud puddle, and can't escape. Pull yourself up and wash yourself off. Get to work. You can accomplish a great deal as long as you keep a positive attitude. Steer clear of people who are negative and critical. They'll be the ones pulling you back down into the mud.


It seems that no one's word now days are impeccable. People say what they want at their own convenience. It's I love you one day and then the next day they are telling you to never speak to them again. They want you in their live forever that morning and they cheat on you that night. What happened to what they said earlier? You never know who is playing the role of a crab in a barrel. People secretly throw shade on another person's shine every single day. We call these haters right? They use that black magic.

I went to bed ticked off last night, not at what someone did to me, but because I let it tick me off to the point that I went to sleep with it in the brain. So naturally I woke up in a fairly foul mood. These are the days I travel to work in complete silence, do some cleaning and redecorating in my head. I refuse to walk into my office with personal problems hanging over my head. So far this has been an emotional week, but hey all women go through it. So keeping the positive thoughts and steering clear from negative people is definitely what's best for me this week.
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College Wednesday - Know Somebody Like This?
I almost forgot it was Wednesday! I'm getting all excited thinking tomorrow was Friday. Clearly I have lost my mind. So yeah, welcome to College Wednesday where we summarize 99% of the people you'll ever meet in college or in life. This week we introduce The Just Doing This For The Free Housing R.A. and The Just Happy To Be Away From Her Dysfunctional Family For A Semester Girl.

Just Doing This For The Free Housing R.A. - This RA just says hi and bye to the residents. Decorates the bulletin board and complete the minimal number of required programs. This R.A. is cool as shit, but makes it clear they are only there for the free housing.

Yeah this R.A. really was cool when I was in college. She didn't make us participate in those dumb ass dorm "floor activities"; stupid decorating contests, board game night, pajama sleep over, pot lucks, ect. I mean seriously I hated my R.A. the freshman year; first semester. She always wanted to have a pot luck. I'm in college, I DON'T HAVE SHIT TO BRING! Unless you want a package of roasted chicken Ramen noodles, and back then I wasn't trying to give those up. Times were hard! But mannnn when my spring semester rolled around; the new R.A. was my ace boon coon. She helped me sneak all the liquor into my dorm room. She bought my bootleg cd's and brought me in some business. She smoked with me, skipped class with me; we were tight. Everybody loved her. She didn't give a damn and loved the free housing. She hated doing those bullshit activities. She would leave the activities she coordinated 10 minutes after it started. Hm, I wonder if she's still a R.A. lmao! Terrorizing the freshmen.

Just Happy To Be Away From Her Dysfunctional Family For A Semester Girl - Jhtbafhdffasg is usually the happiest person on campus. She doesn't take parties for granted. If there are five parties going on simultaneously, she's somehow having the time of her life at all five. She won't disrupt class with any senseless questions, although it may take some time to get use to her everlasting smile, she makes an awesome friend. Always optimistic until winter break rolls around and you have to drag her out of her dorm kicking and screaming.

Okay now this was the girl on campus with her dorm room fully decked out and stocked 5 days before anyone arrived for the fall semester. You wonder how and why she got there so fast. Then during the course of the semester; you see how damn happy she is. She appreciates college a little bit too much. She is down for WHATEVER as long as it's on campus. When you get homesick, she will quickly drag you to the nearest party just to avoid you asking any questions about her home. She has a crap load of money on her student Id card. Her home is on campus. She will be down to go anywhere for spring break; except home. She'll stay the entire break on campus exploring the small ass university town. When we all come back from break, she's discovered at least 3 new bars down in redneck Ville. Knowing good and damn well that we'll all be lynched if we showed up there. At the end of the year, she'll make sure her family picks her up 3 days late and meets her as far away from campus as possible. She's super embarrassed by her family and we'll never know why.

Man I wish I had free housing, so I wouldn't have to work both these jobs and just chill. Ha! Too bad. Gotta get back to work ya'll. See ya next week!
Virtue
I took a vacation day yesterday and thoroughly enjoyed myself. I didn't go to that wack ass family reunion, because I knew people wouldn't do right or know how to act. I got the "t" from my mama early this morning about what all went down. Needless to say, she's not going back to another reunion again, loll. Ahhhh, gotta love family right. Right.

So anyway, I had lunch with a good friend yesterday and I realized how much I miss just sitting down and talking with my buddy one on one. Every time we see one another; we're either surrounded by a bunch of our friends or in a club setting. We rarely ever take time to ourselves and just hang out. She caught me up on a lot of stuff that is going on in her life, as well as I. We spoke about the greatest qualities that people we know have. We also talked about the qualities that we are trying to uphold and live by. So today's quote is about none other than virtues.

"Virtue depends partly upon training and partly upon practice; you must learn first, and then strengthen your learning by action. If this be true, not only do the doctrines of wisdom help us but the precepts also, which check and banish our emotions by a sort of official decree."
- Lucius Annaeus Seneca (Seneca the Younger), "Letters to Lucilius - On the value of advice (Epistle XCIV)"

Our most life altering changes are never done overnight. They do take time and hardwork. Sometimes it even takes a little pain. In my eyes, the more pain we go through, the better the outcome in the future. They say practice makes perfect, or something damn close to it. I think we all have visions of becoming a better person or strengthening attributes in our personal character, but do we really follow through with everything that we say? I know I don't. I'm quick to say, hey well "if this or that person can't handle the way that I am, screw em!" Okay, soooo I STILL FEEL THAT WAY, lol. However, I do know that there are things that can be done to better myself. Things that can be done to eliminate some of the personality clashes that I have with people.

Regina and I also talked about lowering our standards just so certain people can breathe in our world. I don't agree with this. I don't think that anyone should lower their standards for anyone else. Reason being that nobody is going to do the same for you. Trust me. Some of us break our necks to change ourselves for other people that really won't appreciate it anyway. Fact of the matter is that they'll never be satisfied regardless of what we do. They won't see the changes until it is too late. Then again, I guess it does make us a better person for the next person right? Right.

Lately I've been writing down my more personal feelings and indepth feelings on the current love in my life in my other blog. It'tough for me dealing with this love thing man. The person in my life has proven to be one of the biggest obstacles I've faced in a long time. She's teaching the meaning of a true virture that takes practice and training. Lord help me! lol.
Mirrors - T. Nicole Movie Review
So me and my homies Ms. Kisses and T-Redd decided to go grab a bite to eat and take in a movie on Friday night. We had all mentioned that we wanted to see a particular movie, because we all dig a good scary movie. Our movie of choice was Mirrors.



*sigh. Well first of all we went to a 12:15 am show, because we wanted to eat first and it was still packed even at that show. We all vowed never go to that that theatre again, because it has become a HOT MESS. I was on edge and in rare form due to the strong martini I had at dinner. I shouldn't have done that; I don’t know how to act when I'm slightly intoxicated. So everything that happened got on my damn nerves and yes I voiced it. However, I could not blame the liquor on how horrible this movie was. Coming from the makes of The Hills Have Eyes; I expected more.

Wack ass cast as follows..


KIEFER SUTHERLAND



PAULA PATTON
(Robin Thicke's fine ass wife)

AMY SMART


Nobody screamed, nobody jumped, nobody did a damn thing during this movie. In fact the people sitting next to me were on their first date and chose to take the idle time to get to know one another. I heard all about the girl's family history and background. I heard about the guy's schooling situations and pet peeves. I started to ask them both some compatibility questions, but decided against it. That would've been rude. About as rude as them talking that damn loudly in the theatre. Anyway….this is about all the movie consisted of….

Whomp, whomp! People see scarier things when they look at themselves in the mirror every morning. No offense, but you know it's true. Needless to say, don't waste your money people. It ain't worth it!

T. Nicole rates Mirrors with 1 Star!!



What Have You Been Up To? - Weekly Re-Cap
Tgif ya'll! It's been a rather rainy day, but it has gone well all the same. I would say that this week has been a life altering one. I think that every week should be, honestly speaking. If we don't learn something each day and have some type of personal growth, what have we done with our time? When people ask me "Mica, how have you been?" Or "Mica, what have you been up to?" I don't even have enough time to reply. Truth of the matter is that I've been up to so much. I am living life accordingly with the changes made in my personal growth. As routine as I am, my life is forever changing.

I have accepted another lesson in love and in life this week. Acceptance is my life's task and I am willing to accept just that. I came to realize that I am my own soul mate and that the romantic relationships that I get involved in are merely compliments to what I have built within already.

To the ones that passed through my life this week; thank you. I appreciate the lessons you've taught me. You will not be forgotten, because your teachings will be carried forth through me. Thank you.

So, on to the weekend baby!! My family reunion is tomorrow and I am sort of looking forward to it. I am not going to lie, I just want some good food ya'll. Man oh man! I have taken a vacation day off on Monday and I plan to visit with a couple friends, do some shopping and cleaning. Its off to the movies with my friends to see Mirrors; starring Robin Thicke's fine ass wife. So expect a movie review, ya'll know how I do.

I wish everyone a well weekend ahead and to be safe. Oh and drive slow homie; folks getting pulled over! I can testify!
Acceptance; My Life's Ultimate Test
I had a run in with the law this morning and it has me on edge right now. Doing 60 in a 40 exiting the freeway got my ass pulled over with the quickness trying to make it into work by 7:30. DRAT! Needless to say, I was late. The thick tongue officer issued me a ticket. Damn. I'm paying that muthafucka, because I don't have time for court appearances nor defensive driving. Hell, I tried to pay it as soon as I got into the office this morning, but I know that thick tongue officer has to do his thing first. I would've gave him cash if I could, then I would've probably been locked up for attempting to bribe an officer. Blah.

Thursday, August 14, 2008

Aquarius (Jan 20 - Feb 18)

It feels as if you don't have much time left, so taking care of your responsibilities early in the day is a smart idea. Unfortunately, you could work hard, only to discover that you should have been doing something else. But don't look back, for you probably won't see your past very clearly now. Just do what you can to get ready for the big changes ahead.

My horoscope has been contradicting itself lately it seems like. It's making me seem bipolar. Who knows? It's 2008; isn't everybody bipolar and gay now anyway? Whatever. One thing I do agree with here is not looking back. My mom always gets irritated with me, because I don't acknowledge her "what you should've did" comments. Clearly what should've been done was not done and all I can do is deal with the consequences of my present state, learn from them and not make the same mistake twice. Unfortunately, I can't retrace my steps and take back whatever was done. She thinks I'm being careless, I suppose. When in reality, I'm being logical about it. How much time is wasted by dwelling in the past over empty "coulda, woulda shoulda's"? Just have the common sense to not do it again and recognize it as a lesson learned.

I had a nice talk with someone last night about wasted emotion and how all humans are merely artists creating their own image of their life. Behind everyone's eyes is a world. Their world. Their perspective. No one's painted image of life is the same. Some may use similar strokes and similar colors, but it's never the same. I'm learning to not become upset when someone goes against the image that I've painted in my life. It's not their fault, because they've painted their own image and what they did very well may be logical to them. Who am I to say it's right or wrong? I may talk my shit (perhaps call them a circus monkey), frown my nose or I might stop talking to them for a small period of time, but at the end of the day; it's their image vs. my image. Do I let that person being who they are be the cause of me losing sleep at night or not being able to function throughout my day? Heck no! Life is too short for all of that. God did not create us to be the same and this is why he gave each of us our own brains and our own pair of eyes.

Anyone who keeps up with my blog or who considers themselves to be close to me; knows that my constant battle is accepting people. Having no expectations of them and understanding that they are who they are and that is all they will or can be. This has been the hardest thing for me to grasp. I test people and I set standards for them, but they always come up short. They cannot be the image that I paint and it's not fair of me to expect them to be in the first place. Someone whom I've been having a lot of trouble with accepting told me yesterday, "this is who I am, either you deal with it or stop talking to me." I thought about that for a second. I was irritated with that person, because they couldn't seem to hold an organized conversation, they're always bored, and were forever summing me up. I judged this person through my own created image of "perfection". Of course this person was not that. So I had a choice to make. Life is all about acceptance. We accept the things that happen in our lives, we accept the people that walk into our lives and we accept those same people that walk out of our lives for whatever reason. I quoted this before, and I'm doing it again; "It's true that there is conflict, but the conflict is in the human mind and not in the universe."

I can say that I've gotten much better with this whole accepting concept. I believe that God has placed someone in my life that is my ultimate test in this area. I'm tested everyday through this person and I'm learning different techniques in how to handle accepting them for who they are. Not letting my anger and emotions over come me just because they are not what I expect them to be; which is just like me. If I come to the conclusion that I cannot deal with that person and their image, then we both have to accept the fact that we do not fit into each others worlds. Plain and simple right? Righhhtttt.
My 100th Post!!! Dig That Homie!

In only a short three months, I'm now publishing my 100th blog! Back in May I decided to stop blogging on MySpace and Downelink, because nobody on both of those sites really felt me per se. I had heard of BlogSpot before via a couple of friends, but never really checked it out. But when I did! I was hooked. I just had to open up an account on here. I couldn't stop reading people's blogs and I found myself so intrigued at how in-depth people get in their posts. Picture blogs, music blogs, literature blogs, I was totally stoked!

At first I was kind of beat about nobody really reading my words, because I had seem some people with like 200 comments on their blogs, but I quickly got over that. I realized that someone is ALWAYS reading my blog and that this is a form of therapy for me. My own words can't even express how passionate I am about writing. It helps keep my sanity and it paints a picture of my soul through the ink that I disperse from my mind. It is here that I touch the hearts of other people, that I express my inner feelings, and pave the way for time to "work things out" for me.

I just want to thank everyone for taking the time to check me out for the past 3 months. I don’t plan on going anywhere, anytime soon. So if this is your very first visit; get comfortable. My 200th post will be here before you know it!

"The journey of the word hustler is ever going; mark my words."



College Wednesday - Know Somebody Like This?
Happy Hump Day everyone! It's that time again; week 30 of College Wednesday. Seven whole months. For those of you that have been keeping up; thank you. You guys are superb. If this is your first time checking this blog out; welcome to College Wednesday. This is where we summarize 99% of the people you'll ever meet in college or in life. This week we introduce Johnny Frat Boy -or- Sally Sorority Chick and Johnny Three Legs.

Johnny Frat Boy -or- Sally Sorority Chick - While there's certainly nothing wrong being in a Greek organization, some people take their involvement in these groups a little too seriously. These are the people who can't go 2 consecutive days without wearing their shirts from some drinking party they went to last weekend. Johnny Frat Boy likes to brag about how many beers he slammed down Tuesday night, while Sally Sorority Chick acts as though she is too immaculate to be tarnished by your presence. In either case you shouldn't worry about these two personality types too much because they only associate with each other. This brings me to another point: when you see these people outside of class, it is perfectly acceptable to run them over with your motor vehicle of choice.

You know what, all the sorority girls and fraternity boys were nice to me, but then again they were of color. Most of the snooty sorority chicks and beer slamming frat boys that I encountered, were white. Go figure. I never wanted to cross anyone's line, but I loved going to the parties, but these parties were different depending on the race. I went to the black folks frat parties; had a few drinks, danced, had some good food, laughed, witnessed a few fights, maybe dodged a few bottles being thrown and then I went home. I had a healthy hang over the next morning. I went to the white people's frat party; got pissy drunk off of shit I didn't know existed, did NOT dance, watched everybody make-out, throw up or pass out, swam through the beer cans out the front door and somehow made it home. I woke up the next morning feeling like I had died three times and came back to life. When they frat boys say they can't slam down beers; they are NOT LYING! They do however think they are the coolest dudes alive, which is indeed a LIE.

Johnny Three Legs - Usually an average-looking, somewhat lanky guy. Johnny Three Legs is extraordinary on one respect; his ten inch penis. Flaccid. How do you know? Well, he's the guy that faces towards everyone else in communal showers. In forms with individual showers, he dries himself off in public areas, and spends just a bit more time naked than other residents, who usually whip on a towel before they even draw the curtains open. Pity his poor roommate, usually as lonely computer science major that is still a virgin, who is kept up awake at nights from cries of Johnny Three Leg's dates - "Ouch! That hurts! Unggnmph! Oh yeah…yes…God…OUCH! Let's try it another way…yes…oh…God…oh Jesus…OUCH!"

In the words of Bernie Mac; "You don’t understand, I ain't scared of you muthafuckas!" The hell with that Bernie; I'm scared of a ten inch limp dick that has not even began to expand from an erection. I wasn't even able to get with that even when I was into dick, I damn sure can't do it now! Omg! Ouch is right! Some women are long and as wide as a stretch hummer, but not I! 7 and a half, 8; work with me! I'm not trying to become a paraplegic; I love my spine. Ladies, it's not worth it; say NO to Johnny Three Legs! Or hell, say no to all of them and call me. *wink* Ha! I'm sure I just scared away at least 5 heterosexual women with that last line, sorry!!!

Well, I'm utterly disgusted after this post, loll. But hey, blogging with a diverse group of readers sometimes involves sacrifices. So thanks for checking out this week's College Wednesday. See ya'll next week. Peace.
Exploration + Experience = Wisdom
My emotions are in an uproar this afternoon. I still can't phantom the lost of Bernie Mac and now Isaac Hayes. These were two great and extremely talented men that has contributed to the entertainment and joy of many. I guess the loss of all people that have brought joy to my life in some way caused me to drop a few tears this afternoon. I know that death is a part of life, but the suffering behind it all is indescribable. It's something that I try not to think about, because it only makes me angry that I cannot control it. I won't be able to control my emotions once it happens and I cannot prevent it from happening at all. It’s the biggest bullet that people have to bite. Man oh man; what an afternoon. I started off writing about 3 blogs this morning and became stuck in one spot on all of them. When my emotions are torn like this, I get all discombobulated and can't seem to focus my own thoughts and can't seem to form them in sentence structure. So I kept thinking about what can be pulled out of all of my emotions today, and wisdom came to mind. Gaining wisdom through life's experience. Ansel Adams is who I chose to quote today.

"In wisdom gathered over time I have found that every experience is a form of exploration." - Ansel Adams

With every situation that we go through in life, something positive should be pulled out of it. A lesson should be learned and wisdom should be gained. Every problem that we face should be explored from all perspectives, and just letting the problem over power you should never be an option. Using problems as an excuse for negative connotations in your life should never be an option either.

Someone whose opinion I value; told me that I acted as if I had everything together and basically that nothing could phase me. We came to the common ground that everyone is different and everyone handles things in life differently. I however, choose not to let people or things pose as a critical problem for me. If in fact they do become a life altering problem, then best believe I will be leaning towards the positive side of it all. It's enough shit in the world that are causing all of our lives to be shortened, and I don't need my own self battles to be one of them. So I gather up the wisdom that I've learned through my past experiences, the experiences of loved ones and I push through it. Sometimes I may even have to crawl through it, but I get to the other side no matter what. Never stop moving.

So to everyone who feels my nonchalant attitude is a problem or who feel as if I think I'm better than them, that's not true. I choose to handle things differently in my life and that's the bottom line. I can't ride the emotional rollercoasters that I use to ride, my wisdom and ever growing common sense won't allow me to do such. The people in my life that choose to ride such coasters can do so without me sitting there next to them. I will be here when they get off, because I accept the fact that people grow at different points in life. My friend helped me to realize that just because I may see things at a certain perspective in life at this time, does not mean that everyone else will. Some people may have to go through the same problems more than once before they learn the true lesson in such problems. The wisdom isn't always gained the first go round.

However, I can't live any differently that what I'm living today, because of the simple fact that this is me. This is what Tamica Nicole consists of today. I'm proud of my accomplishments and appreciative of all the things that I've gone through in my past and the wisdom gained from such situations. I can only hope that everyone gets to a stage in their life where they've accepted their past and do not become idle in their problems and use them as an excuse to act out. So if there is anything that I took from my conversation with that special woman yesterday; it was not to pass so much judgement on people because they have not reached a certain stage in life; no matter what their age is. In the same breath, I hope that judgement is not passed upon me, because I'm accepting of my life's issues, confident in myself and refuse to let such temporary issues and people control my emotions. Everyone was created with their own special design and timeline. I respect and appreciate this fact. So to you ma'am, thanks for checking me and laying that wisdom down on me. It has been stored for future reference.
Funhouse
Well I'm here stuck at work and not too happy about it. Comcast has scheduled everyone and their mother for overtime today, and nobody is calling! I hate when they do that, because it makes my night go by so slow. It's bad enough that I have to be here on a Saturday night anyway. Oh well, the money has to be made; that's for sure. I am a little weirded out today, because of the news on Bernie Mac's death. Just a couple days ago, it was declared as a rumor and it was said that he was doing better. Now he's dead. Pneumonia is no joke! We seem to be losing a lot of black stars. Well not just black, we are losing a lot of people period. It just proves that now is the time to get right or get left. Enough of that though, I'm not trying to be depressed at the moment.

So I've been dealing with having my Sister around my apartment, and it's not all that bad I guess. She does stay out of the way and she cleans up after herself; it just all boils down to me wanting what is best for her. I am trying to have patience though. Most know how hard that is for me to obtain, but I've come a long way with it in my opinion. I just released myself from a situation with someone that has taught me a lot in only a 2 week time period. It taught me to truly check myself and how I handle people, because it truly is unattractive. It taught me that sometimes even the most intellectual people can be the craziest people. It taught me that my nonchalant attitude really causes pain for some people. It taught me to truly learn to communicate no matter how much a fool the other party is acting. It taught me that if changes aren't made early; they are harder to shake later in life. It taught me to get the hell out of dodge when someone reveals their mentally unstable behavior. Another lesson learned and accepted. I love life and all that it gives me, good and bad. It helps me to grow stronger and wiser. They say life is a bitch; depending on how you dress her. Well my bitch looks good ya'll! Dressed in the finest stitches, I wouldn't change her for nothing!

Aquarius - August 9, 2008
Your dreams work out quite nicely in your head, dear Aquarius, but the problem now is turning them into some sort of real life scenario. Be careful of taking too much of an intellectual approach. When it comes to relationships, things don't normally happen logically or rationally. You are going to have to leave a great deal up to chance, so just learn to deal with things as they come.

Damn this dream stuff, I have woke the hell up! At times I do float in the clouds or get trapped in my own mind, and it all comes with the territory of being an Aquarius, but I do try to remember to float back on down to earth every now and then. I've been called irrational many times in my life when it comes to dealing with people I'm dating or people I'm in a relationship with. I have come to realize that I'm not all that bad! However, I do need to break those "it's my way or the highway" habits and understand that the world does not revolve completely around me. I was placed in a funhouse full of mirrors for the past couple of weeks, and I did not like what I saw. I did not like where my future personality traits were headed. Reality check ya'll! Thank you God for placing me in that situation in order show me what it's like for people on the outside looking in.

"The universe is as simple as it is or it is not, but humans complicate everything....It's true that there is a conflict, but the conflict only exists in the human mind, not in the universe." - Don Miguel Ruiz. Dude ain't said nothing but a word! Humans truly do complicate everything. Nothing can ever be "as is", because we question it all. We try to define every situation that we are in. Some things aren't meant to have a definition as soon as you walk in the door. With time comes answers and then a proper definition will follow. Now the situation that I was currently in could've been handled on my behalf much differently than I handled it. I could've committed emotional suicide and escalated everything to the fullest. My days could've grown longer and my nights could've been sleepless. I didn't see the sense in putting myself through all of that though. Acceptance goes a long way in life. Accepting things the way that they are and not forcing something that obviously isn't going to fit will eliminate the heartache and headaches in the future. Does this mean that I don't care? Hell no, because I do care. I care enough to walk away and accept the fact that some things that people go through need to be gone through on their own. That's the only way that progress will be made, guaranteed happiness with self, and a better time spent with the next person that walks into your life.

I feel free again and I'm looking forward to the outcome of the changes that I'll be making. I wonder what doors will open up for me and what people will be walking through those doors into my life. Hm, we shall see. Break is over now and it's back to the phone lines. I hope everyone is having a kick ass weekend! See ya'll Monday, peace.
Survey Time!
I stole this survey from Eb!!

Pick One:

A month: February. I'll be 25 years old this coming February and I'm bitter sweet about it. It's a milestone and I am happy that I've come this far and all, but my 20's are slowly running out.

A day of the week: Sunday, because it is my only day out of the week and that I do not have to work a single job. On the seventh day she rests!

A direction: There isn't any direction but up for me. If I look down, I might fall and that ain't happening homie!

A historical figure: Corretta Scott King

A kind of weather: I love the winter time. I like Winter in Texas. 60-65 degree weather.

An animal: Aww, I like kittens.

A flower: I don't like flowers

A color: Black

A sound: The sound of Ella Fitzgerald's voice.

An element: Air, because without it; I wouldn't be able to catch the beautiful sounds of music, children laughing and my beautiful mother's voice. I wouldn't be able to breathe either and that's always a plus, loll.

A song: Ledisi - Alright

A book: The Voice of Knowledge - Don Miguel Ruiz

A food: Smothered Chicken

A place: My parents house.

A material: Whatever material her dress would be made of the very first time we meet.

A taste: Man, I'll be good. I do love the taste of honey though.

A scent: Man anything that smells good on a woman's skin. Oh and it must linger! I want to smell her 5 minutes after she leaves a room.

A word: Genuine

An object: Sidekick

A body part: Neck full of veins!!!

A facial expression: dumbfounded

A time of day: 9:00pm! I am finally free from working all day long!

Random Questions:

How many people have you kissed in 2008 that actually meant something?

Meant something huh? 2 I guess.

Were you happy when you woke up today?

I sure was.

Do you hate the last person you kissed?

No

What are you listening to right now?

A commercial on the radio.

Have you ever liked somebody and never told them?

Yes

What would I find if I looked UNDER your bed?

A duffel bag full of things nobody needs to know about.

What are you wearing?

black slacks, a burgandy button down blouse and some black shoes.

Are you texting anyone right now?

am about to return someone's text message.

Do you like anyone right now?

I sure do.

Have you ever kissed someone and never saw them again?

No

Have you ever thought about getting your nose pierced?

No

What can't you wait for?

To go play bingo with my friends, lmao!

Have your parents ever smoked?

Yes.

Do you want someone back in your life?

Yes.

Who was the last person who called you?

My friend Regina. I miss her ass so much!

Are you good at giving directions?

Hell no. I will have a person everywhere except where they need to be.

Would your parents be mad if you got pregnant /got someone pregnant?

I'm sure they'd be disappointed.

Rent a movie or go to movies?

Go to the movies

What did you eat last?

Some chicken

Has anyone told you they missed you lately?

Yes.

Is your ex still in your life as a friend?

Yes.

Are you wearing any clothes that don't belong to you?

No

Would you ever steal someones boyfriend or girlfriend?

I have more than a few times before, and karma rocked my world upside down!

Mountains or the beach?

beach

When was the last time you cried?

Sometime last month.

Who's someone you miss?

Ebonee

How many times have you been in love?

I've been "in love" twice.

How many times have you had your heart broken?

Twice

Do you hate people who are obsessed with things like High School Musical, Hannah Montana, and The Jonas Brothers?

What the hell is this stuff? Shows?

Have you ever spread a rumor about someone?

No, but I have passed on the word.

Did you French kiss before you were 16?

Wayy before. *cough* I was a fast beginner. I'm not proud of this.

Who is the first person you think of when someone asks you who you like?

Ebonee

Have you ever liked someone who all your friends hate?

No.

Do you prefer to call or text someone?

Call

Were you bad in high school?

No

Would you take any of your ex's back?

No

Do you cry over girls/boys?

If I'm "in love" with that girl.

At what age did you start noticing the opposite gender?

1st grade.

Are you happy with your love situation?

I love me! Of course I'm happy with that. I have somebody sneaking in the picture though. She's one tough cookie too. Man oh man.

Last boy/girl to hurt you?

I love that girl and she's my friend, so it doesn't even matter!

Would you fail your drug and alcohol test?

No

Who's your favorite person to cuddle with?

I don’t like to cuddle.
College Wednesday - Know Somebody Like This?
Well I'm happy to be alive after that HORRIBLE, HORRIBLE hurricane yesterday. Hurricane Edouard aka Fast Eddie. He came through so strong and tough that we weren't even touched! All that fuss yesterday for nothing. Businesses shut down, summer school out, grocery stores out of water and some food and no decent reports on the news other than about this damn hurricane; turned tropical storm; turned light drizzle! My office was deserted yesterday, but guess who showed up to work? Yep, you're damn right; I did! I said this last week and I'll say it again now, I don't have time for no damn hurricanes; I have shit to do! Well with that being said, welcome all hurricane survivors to College Wednesday. Ya'll know the drill; this is where we summarize 99% of the people you'll ever meet in college or in life. This week we introduce The I-Placed-Into-Higher-Level-Classes-You-Should-Think-I'm-The-Shit-Cause-I-Do! and The Jackass of All Trades.

I-Placed-Into-Higher-Level-Classes-You-Should-Think-I'm-The-Shit-Cause-I-Do! - This individual is a Freshman who managed to get placed into upper level courses. Because of this, he will establish a heightened feeling of self-worth, and will consider himself to be a worthy equal to the majors in said department. He will bring up the fact that he is a FRESHMAN at every opportunity, and will become confounded when the upperclassmen in the same major aren't fawning over him or trying to suck his cock out of amazement at how awesome he must be, because he's taking upper level classes, and at the fact that he's merely a FRESHMAN. If it is a language course, he will try to chat in that language, regardless of the fact that you won't understand what the fuck he's saying. Not because he's better than you, but in his pretentious righteousness, he doesn't realize he completely sucks at it.

*Shaking my damn head.* I've come to realize that when people make a big fuss about something regarding themselves or make useless announcements about how great they are; no one usually cares. So you have this guy doing THE MOST to toot his own horn. He's working overtime just to get you to life an eyebrow. Oh but you do lift that eyebrow; not out of amazement, but it's more of a "if this asshole says one more thing about how great they are I'm going ape shit!" eyebrow raise. This person is kind of like the Intellectual Superhero we introduced last week now that I think about it. They both are incredible back benders and have the ability to suck their own dicks, because nobody else is; that's for sure! I love my pretentious (made to look or sound important) people though; they keep the rest of us in clear contact with reality. Thanks so much.

Jackass of All Trades - This man is seemingly adept in all subjects, and will boast about it too. Hear him complain about how easy his last Abstract Algebra exam was, how he wrote his African American studies paper two hours before it's due, and how little he prepared for his sociology presentation. His weakness is poor social skills. Ask him about his girlfriend for massive emotional baggage!

Could this be a book smarts vs. street smarts scenario? Clearly this dude is highly intelligent and he knows it. He knows everything book wise. But there is something that's called balance that is needed in life. Having no social life is unhealthy. People have lost their minds in books, the bible included…won't go there though. Sometimes the person that won't put down the book is just as bad as the person who won't pick up the book. We have two jackasses of all trades. Balance is the key. So Mr. Jackass; I'm sure your parents are extremely proud of you and your ingenious academic skills, but your girlfriend is pissed! That's why she's at my house!

Welp, thanks for reading people. For those of you still pretending you're in danger of the hurricane and did not show up to work; you'll be unemployed tomorrow and that's good for your asses! Seriously though, ya'll pray for me; this is going to by an emotionally bumpy day! I'm out.
Lord Open My Heart In Humility
So my big sister who is 15 years my senior needs a place to stay until she gets on her feet. I feel bad right now because I don't want her to stay with me. I know it sounds harsh, but I have my reasons. Let me explain.

Now I am technically an only child by my mother and was raised in the house the only child as well. My dad had 2 kids by his first wife whom were both over 12 yrs older than me. I really did not get to know them until I got older, they both got married, had kids and I was living my own life. My brother was murdered in '98 and that left me and my sis. We still did not become close after that. It was not until her and her husband of 11 yrs divorced and she moved back to the States from Germany. She and her 2 kids moved in with my parents and I.

I was stoked my big sis and my babies were going to be there. We all grew close over the years. The kids moved back in with their dad and it seems like everything just went down from there.

You know how its just hard for some people to get back on their feet when they fall down? My sis is one of them. My family and I love her so much and help in any way we can, we just don't know when things will get better.

When I moved out of my parents house and was getting reaady to sign my first lease; I signed a one year 2 bedroom 2 bathroom lease for both me and my sister , because she didn't have anywhere to go. The very next day she changed her mind for a reason I still do not know of and there I was stuck out with the rent and that big ass apartment alone. For an entire year! Hence the reason why I had to get this second job I am at this very second.

She went on to live with a friend for over a year and now the friend wants her out. The friend feels that my sis could have made moves by now and I agree. After I moved from my last place and found my cozy one bedroom one bath dream apartment, now she REALLY needs a place to stay.

I am just disappointed that the woman whom I should be looking up to can't seem 2 get it together. I am the baby sis and people, as well as myself, forget that she is 15 years older than me.

What can I do though? She is family and she needs me. She already said she would be needing to "crash" until August 31st. I pray that it does not take that long, because I cannot do this for longer than that.
Finally Here - Weekly Re-Cap
I feel like I've been blogging all damn day. However, I couldn't let the day go by without doing my weekly re-cap. This week has finally come to an end and the BED is calling my name in more ways than one; if you get my drift. Smh, I won't go there though. Don’t wanna offend anybody, ya'll know how concerned I am with doing that.

This week I've learned how unimpressed I am with a lot of people in my life and most of the entertainment supplied by society is blah, blah, blah. The word of the week was monkeys and I have seen a lot of them this week. I'm not impressed, but boy did I have a knee slapping time watching them do their tricks. I now view life as a big table and a lot of people are bringing the same thing to it. There is no such thing as originality or uniqueness anymore. Ah! Switch this shit up, please!

After going through this week, I've decided to catch my feelings and bring them to a hault for a particular woman, because let's just say I need a little bit more proof of purchase. Trusting someone is a hard thing for me to do and I just don’t want any déjà vu occurrences here. So the feeling of infatuation is great and all however, some more cards need to be flipped over on this table.

Anywho, I hope everyone has an awesome weekend. And for those of you who are sexually backed up like I am, please go get some. I don't feel like dealing with no ones attitudes come Monday morning! Peace.
What's Your Purpose In Life
Didn't I just write a quote of the month blog last week? It's already August?! What happened to the summer? I guess that's what happens when your days run into each other as mine do. Well, lets see; last month I wrote on the topic of peace and understanding. I tried to incorporate this into my days during the month of July and I believed it helped me out a little bit. I do that feel that it was a peaceful month for me and nothing was obtained by force, but only through understanding. Einstein paved the way last month and I've decided to let my cousin, your cousin, everybody's cousin; Norman Cousins pave the way this month.

"If something comes to life in others because of you, then you have made an approach to immortality." - Norman Cousins

I've seen many surveys posted on this site, MySpace and have even been asked in job interviews a very interesting question; what is one thing you want to accomplish before you leave this earth? Many people say they'd like to raise a family, become wealthy and successful, make sure that they're just a good person when they go on. Well in my opinion, I don't think that my life was all that fulfilling if I do not leave this earth without touching the soul, heart and mind of at least one person I've crossed paths with.

Immortality; meaning never dying or a famous person or thing. How many famous actors, singers, rappers, authors, politicans and so forth do we know that has passed away that is still being mentioned today? They are still living within many people still walking around on earth. That's what I want to do. I don’t want the fame and the luxuries can be kept. I just want to reach people through what I do. I want to be remembered for the words that I've written and for the person who I am. I want to live on within friends, family, co-workers, strangers; whomever I've crossed paths with, physically or mentally.

So what is your purpose in life? Is it to help others? Is it to teach others? Is it to give to others? Do you want to only be remembered for what you had? What you took? Or what you gave? Think about it…
You Know You're Broke; Act Like It
In this day in age, we're all feeling the wrath of the screwed up economy. Some of us have had to alter our lifestyles just to make it day by day. Hey, I'm scrapping pennies and am not ashamed to admit it. Everybody isn't able to ball out of control. However, we all have a friend that claims to be balling out of control, but is lying their asses off! So I got this article from a friend of mine and we found it to be very helpful. I've altered it a little bit to reach a particular audience! So here are a few tips on balling on a budget and keeping it real.

1.) Don't watch me, watch T.V.

Please stop trying to compete with your friends. Just because they go out and buy cars, new clothes and purchase new furniture; does not mean you have to take it a step further and buy a new hummer, an entire new wardrobe, and purchase a new house. Stop watching your friends so closely just to try and out do them. Fucking trap stars; you're trapped in this vicious cycle and have no idea how to get out. You're only digging your hole deeper and deeper. It's okay to buy things when you are ready. Bitch you know you broke; act like it.

2.) Stop lying.

Stop making irrelevant announcements about what you have and what you're going to get. We all know that you're not getting shit. Your real friends know the truth already, and they will accept you regardless of how much you have in the bank account. True friends look out for one another in this area. If you broke, we got you. If we all broke, we hit up the nearest value menu, stay in the house and enjoy each other's company. "To get what you've never had; you must do what you've never done" and STOP LYING! No one believes what you're saying anyway. Bitch you know you broke; act like it.

3. Balling on A Budget.

You know how much free stuff is at our fingertips in this world?! You're trying to join high class gyms, when you can walk out your front door and go on a brisk jog; or a full sprint to dodge the bullets flying at your head in your ghetto ass neighborhood. Stop trying to keep up with your friends by accepting invitations on expensive ass vacations. You know you can't go, so just say so. Tell them you'll catch them next time or suggest something more suitable to fit your financial situation. Your real friends will understand. Bitch you know you broke; act like it.

4. Paycheck to Paycheck.

Instead of coming up with lies as to why you can't make a certain event planned by your friends; keep it real and let them know that you don't get paid until next week and to holler at you then! It's okay if you can't go see a movie in the theatres, we ALL KNOW a bootleg man. We can just come over your place and make it a movie night in the house. Plan ahead of time. Budget out your expenses and when that next paycheck comes you'll be ready. You know you're broke man; act like it!

5. Do you.

Spend your money how you want to spend it. Don't let others decide for you. Peer pressure is a MOTHER for some people. None of your friends are paying your bills and damn sure aren't paying your rent that is due on Saturday, but you realllyyy want to go to the club with them on Friday. Go head, and you won't have a place to live on Sunday. Prioritize. Do things at your own leisure. You're broke; act like it.

In conclusion, if you have to pay for your friendships and break your bank just to keep up with them, you need to find a new group of friends. Maybe a nice homeless man or woman. They are always friendly, but who knows you'll probably be trying to keep up with them as well. Damn circus monkeys! Barnum and Bailey is in town and they need a new act; go apply. You know you need the money!
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