This is so not the business. Could it be that Tamica, Mica Mica, T. Nookie, T. Nook the muthafuckin' crook is crushing on someone?! Ugh! This feeling is so overrated, because the person that I'm crushing on will probably prove to be a total lowlife, insecure, lying, unemployed idiot. Who will piss me off, and will end up being another female assassinated by I; the dating/relationship assassin.
Yesterday I was thinking about how I was a couple of years ago and I would find pleasure in attracting to people who were in happy relationships. Well, what seemed to be happy to the naked eye. I however would come into the picture and sprinkle my charm dust, break them off something real proper like, and send them back to their unhappy relationships. "You down with O.P.P? Yeah you know me!" It was easier that way to me. I did not have the responsibility of being a committed girlfriend. I was there for the moment that we both agreed upon and I was out until our next encounter. Anything else; their mate was responsible for, not me. It did not matter to me, they could've been married with kids, fresh relationship, long term relationship, as long as they were not mine; I did not care. I was wrong on so many levels. Just like a thief in the night who has never been caught, but have had a few close calls. Husbands coming home sooner than expected, girlfriends catching on to the fact that I wasn't that nice wholesome girl who sang in the choir with their lady. I soon got tired of this way of living. First of all I was getting older, it was much too dangerous for my blood, and it was just plain wrong. Of course, Karma has reared her ugly head and has kicked my ass up, down, diagonal and sideways. Now I can't seem to find a woman suitable enough for me. Failed relationships and broken hearts have taught me valuable lessons that is for sure.
I've pretty much kept quiet in this love department. My last relationship (and I do use that term loosely) was pretty much a joke. It was something that should've never been done and thought through more carefully. We are great friends now, but it is just yet another assassinated relationship. Yesterday, I spoke with someone that I basically let pass me by, because I had my head up my own ass and wrote her off as not good enough for me. Now she's in a happy relationship with the next person, whom she actually introduced me to at the club one night. Blah. I started to get that itch again ya'll. Like, I can kill that noise if I wanted to. I mentioned yesterday that we should hang out sometime, but then said that it would probably not be such a great idea since she is in a relationship. Grrr, this being respectful thing, sucks ass. That is why I do keep to myself, because I don't know how to act, loll.
Aquarius - June 5, 2008
I don’t know, I was thinking that maybe I should start dating again. I'm not looking for a relationship by no means, but it's always nice to have an "understanding" friend. We can both be in the same boat and see eye to eye on the whole love thing. That is until sex enters the equation and things get all fucked up. I have a few nominees as to who I'd like to go out with, but I have to think this through. Maybe I'll put all their pictures up my living room wall and ponder over each one of them like Flavor does right before he eliminates one. The one I'm thinking about the most may or may not be in a relationship. I probably need to find that out, loll. If she just got out of it, I don't think that'll be a good idea either. I can't stand a rebound female. Easier to smash, but wayyyy to vulnerable. I’m not into playing captain save a ho. We shall see though.
Yesterday I was thinking about how I was a couple of years ago and I would find pleasure in attracting to people who were in happy relationships. Well, what seemed to be happy to the naked eye. I however would come into the picture and sprinkle my charm dust, break them off something real proper like, and send them back to their unhappy relationships. "You down with O.P.P? Yeah you know me!" It was easier that way to me. I did not have the responsibility of being a committed girlfriend. I was there for the moment that we both agreed upon and I was out until our next encounter. Anything else; their mate was responsible for, not me. It did not matter to me, they could've been married with kids, fresh relationship, long term relationship, as long as they were not mine; I did not care. I was wrong on so many levels. Just like a thief in the night who has never been caught, but have had a few close calls. Husbands coming home sooner than expected, girlfriends catching on to the fact that I wasn't that nice wholesome girl who sang in the choir with their lady. I soon got tired of this way of living. First of all I was getting older, it was much too dangerous for my blood, and it was just plain wrong. Of course, Karma has reared her ugly head and has kicked my ass up, down, diagonal and sideways. Now I can't seem to find a woman suitable enough for me. Failed relationships and broken hearts have taught me valuable lessons that is for sure.
I've pretty much kept quiet in this love department. My last relationship (and I do use that term loosely) was pretty much a joke. It was something that should've never been done and thought through more carefully. We are great friends now, but it is just yet another assassinated relationship. Yesterday, I spoke with someone that I basically let pass me by, because I had my head up my own ass and wrote her off as not good enough for me. Now she's in a happy relationship with the next person, whom she actually introduced me to at the club one night. Blah. I started to get that itch again ya'll. Like, I can kill that noise if I wanted to. I mentioned yesterday that we should hang out sometime, but then said that it would probably not be such a great idea since she is in a relationship. Grrr, this being respectful thing, sucks ass. That is why I do keep to myself, because I don't know how to act, loll.
Cupid has shot his arrow in your heart today, dear Aquarius, so snuggle up closely with the object of your desire. You will find yourself feeling more sensual and romantic than usual. Gourmet foods and fine wines should accompany you at the dinner table tonight. Realize that there may be an element of restraint that needs to get worked into the equation, but don't let this stop you from having a good time.
I don’t know, I was thinking that maybe I should start dating again. I'm not looking for a relationship by no means, but it's always nice to have an "understanding" friend. We can both be in the same boat and see eye to eye on the whole love thing. That is until sex enters the equation and things get all fucked up. I have a few nominees as to who I'd like to go out with, but I have to think this through. Maybe I'll put all their pictures up my living room wall and ponder over each one of them like Flavor does right before he eliminates one. The one I'm thinking about the most may or may not be in a relationship. I probably need to find that out, loll. If she just got out of it, I don't think that'll be a good idea either. I can't stand a rebound female. Easier to smash, but wayyyy to vulnerable. I’m not into playing captain save a ho. We shall see though.
I may have to shove a arrow up cupid's ass if he's toying with me again.
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I'm with you on killing cupid... i am having fun with my current boo and done f'd up cuz now he know I'm digging him... and he did something to play with my emotions... now I feel like he has the power and I hate that ish... I gotta figure out how to get it back.
Dating is really for the birds!
Yes, get the power back girl! The fact that you're digging this guy is good though. It's a nice feeling but knowing there is a possible negative outcome is the sucky part.