She and I had been going strong for about 6 months. We were beyond the point of being in love. She was a part of me. We were young, dumb and freshly gay, loll. This was my very first girlfriend, and the feeling was indescribable. I was forming into something that had no room for shame nor insecurity. This was my lifestyle; our lifestyle.


We met in college. Neither one of us finished, but back then we were on some sort of a mission. Two smart young women. Pressured by the drugs, sex and alcohol; but we got our studies in and maintained an average GPA. She was younger than I and only came to my school for an English class. She was in a program for Liberal arts and required for her to attend my university for this specific English class. I hated our schedules and the fact that we didn't attend the same schools. I dealt with it though. Our relationship was quite rocky, because I always felt something was missing or being left unsaid. We summed it all up as me being paranoid, because of the dirt that I had swept under the rug. As true as this was, I was still convinced that something was a miss!


Her and I had a couple mutual friends, but for the most part all of my friends were older and hers were younger. So we didn't all mesh too well, loll me and my friends thought we were hot shit anyway. It was the Spring semester right before our summer vacation started. I was quite saddened, because she was going back to Jersey for the summer. I was going to miss her so much, and would have to fight every temptation coming my way. Needless to say, I wasn't looking forward to the summer months at all.


Trying to rid my mind of the months ahead, I got ready for a few graduations I had lined up to attend. The college graduations were first and then came the high school. This booked up 3 weekends in a row for me. I had one more graduation to attend at the beginning of June for my little cousin. He was graduating from high school, and planned on attending the same university as I. We both anticipated his arrival. I didn't however anticipate sitting through yet another long drawn out graduation ceremony in hot ass Texas.


The Compaq Center was packed! All the supporting friends and families of the class of 2006. I forgot how complicated parking and seating was at this place. I mean I hadn't been there since I graduated 3 years before. I was riding solo that day, because my family were all coming at different times. I hate waiting around and I hate being late to any occasion. So I was the designated person to go ahead of everybody else and save the seats. I saw a few familiar faces and I stopped and spoke to a couple of old classmates. I was a little surprised to see my Bahamian beauty's folks entering the same section of seating that I was.


"Hey honey!" Her Aunt reached out and gave me a big hug. I returned the gesture and my eyes scanned the crowd for the love of my life. I had just got off the phone with her before parking, and she told me she was getting dressed. I didn't bother asking were she was going, because I had planned to see her later on that night.


"Hey Aunt Dorothy, what are you guys doing here?" I asked nodding to the rest of the family present. I've seen them all on a few occasions here and there. Some of them did not approve of my role in her life, but they keep it cordial and respectful when we do see one another.


"We're here to support our baby girl!" I had forgotten she had a cousin a few years younger than her graduating this year. I didn't know she went to the same school as my cousin though.


"Oh yes, well I guess I'm here to see a couple of people walk across that stage then," I said looking out to the crowd growing by the second. I knew I had to make a mad dash for the nearest open row of seats before they were all claimed for.


"Yes, honey. We are so glad our baby has finally done it! She's the last one for a long time." We all started moving down the steps looking for empty sections. I found one down towards the bottom, and decided to block those two rows off. I knew one of my family members would be here soon to help me weed off the people.


I saw Aunt Dorothy and the rest of her family filling up the section to the right side of me. I looked in a couple of the familiar faces and read the sign of disapproval upon them. I didn’t care though. We as people can't help who we fall in love with. Speaking of love, I decided to text her once more to see if she was coming or not. The ceremony was to begin in about 15 minutes or so, but I know she was never one to be on time if she was going somewhere without me.


My people started to arrive when the opening music began to play and the graduates started to march in. I heard her family cheering as I was facing the top of the stairs looking for my love. She never texted me back, but I figured she was on her way or didn't hear the phone. I knew her family was cheering for the young graduate, but by the time I turned around she had already passed. I saw what I thought was the back of her walking towards the designated seats. I got comfortable in my chair, because I knew this was going to be a very long ceremony. I pulled out my cell phone and started to play a game.


My cell phone was damn near dead by the time I realized she was not going to show up. The last names beginning with "T's" were making their way across the stage. I really wanted to leave when my cousin walked about 45 minutes ago, but I said I would stay for the entire thing. I saw her family begin to rise out of the corner of my eye. I could hear the anticipation as they awaited for the young one to cross. I could actually see her edging up towards the top of the ramp. She was shorter than I remembered her being though. I could see the profile of her face when my 3 month old cousin sitting next to me on his mother's lap placed his hand on my arm. I turned towards him and smiled when I heard her name. The family all yelled, screamed and blew whistles as she crossed the stage. I sat there frozen solid as my eyes followed her coming down the ramp with a huge smile plastered on her face. My eyes kept following her while she looked around the audience for her loved ones. She spotted them, but she must've felt my gaze, because we met eye contact and that smile quickly faded.


No wonder she didn't respond to my text messages. Graduates can't carry cell phones in to the commencement areas. The name I heard being called was not the name of that young cousin that I remembered. It was HER. The love of my life. It was then that I realized that I'd been played. She just graduated from high school! She'd been lying to me the entire time. Our eyes unlocked when the graduate behind her playfully punched her in the shoulder; letting her know that she needed to catch up with the rest of the line.


I suddenly felt sick to my stomach. I ended up breaking my promise to my cousin after telling the rest of our family that I needed to go home and lay down. I just had to get out of there. I didn't know where to place my emotions. I wanted to cry, laugh and rejoice all at the same time. I finally got the answer to the question that had been burning the inside of my head for the past 6 months. I knew what the missing piece of the puzzle was. I also knew that it was the end of my relationship as I knew it.


FACT OR FICTION?


**P.S.- Excuse any typos or grammatical errors. I damn near wrote this with my eyes closed on the remaining 10 minutes of my lunch break.**

I still love you Drizzy. That's super embarrassing though. I didn't even laugh; I promise. You know everybody else is though. Even Lil' Wayne. *sad face* Forget Wayne, you don't have to go back to that wheelchair you were in on Degrassi! Although, I wish you would've handled it like a G like Beyonce did when she did that military tuck and roll down the stairs on her tour. If it's any consolation to you; they would've had to carry my ass offstage too!

On the current mission to revive BlogSpot, I'm thinking of doing a Thursday fact or fiction post every week. This will help me with my consistency in posting and hopefully snag some more readers. It'll also help me sharpen my writing skills as well. I know that Eb aka The Renaissance Black Woman used to do these posts awhile back. Not too sure if she's still doing them though. I always enjoyed reading hers, because she would fool me every time. I really didn’t know if her stories were fact or fiction. It would blow my mind that she actually went through some of the stuff she wrote about, loll. Check her out sometimes, I promise you won't be disappointed.


Anyhow, on with the story.


It was about 4:30am on a Saturday morning. I was just leaving the club when I noticed that I needed to get some gas. Now, I HATE filling my tank up and because of my weird habits; I only like to get gas on Tuesdays at one particular station. I didn’t have a choice to break my routine though. I knew I had quite a drive ahead of me to her house. I called her up earlier during the week to see how she was doing. We have the type of relationship where our worlds are not in tune with one another. We don't speak every day and sometimes we can go weeks or months at a time without contacting each other. However, there are times when she crosses my mind and I cross her's. We're two busy women that just don't have time for steady committed relationships. When we do get around to making THAT call; we both know what it is and what's going to go down.


I'm driving down the block hoping to make it to the corner of the southwest freeway and Fondren. The last thing I needed was to be stranded, tipsy and with a bunch of shit on me. I made it though; slowly creeping up to pump 5. Not a soul was in site, but I could see the cashier behind the register reading a magazine. I fumbled to get my wallet out of my back pocket when my phone started blasting Jamie Foxx's, Slowly. I knew she was wondering where I was.


"Hello?"
"Hey, how far are you?" "I'm still a ways away. I almost ran out of gas, so I'm up here at the Shell off 59."


I saw an old school Buick pull up in front of the door to the station. It made me think about my old car. Damn I missed that ride. I miss the booming' ass system I had too. People could always hear me before they saw me. I had to hand it down to my cousin though. Speaking of system, these dudes had more bang in their trunk than a little bit. It was extra loud, because there was no activity on the street.


Tuning back in to our conversation, I could hear the impatience in her voice when she said, "well, I'm waiting on you. I've BEEN waiting on you, but I didn't think you would stay in the club until it closed."


She was so cute when she tried to cop an attitude with me. "My bad babe, I'm just going to fill up and do a buck eighty straight to your crib! K?"


"NO SPEEDING, you have enough tickets as it is Tamica. I'm not playing. Besides, I ain't going nowhere."


"You better not be. Give me 30 mins though, iigh?"

"Alright, bye."


I hung up the phone and retrieved my wallet. I’m so glad I had the option to pay at the pump, because I didn't feel like stumbling to the store and especially in the mist of all those dudes. I can't believe how many of them were piled in that car. I just wanted to put my $40.00 in and go see my lady.


I reached hit $21.34 on the tank when I noticed the music blasting suddenly stopped. My back was facing the actual store; so naturally I turned my head slightly to see if the dudes had finally left. They didn't. Another vehicle was parked beside them. An all black hummer sitting on 20 something's. I could see the Buick shaking wildly like somebody was jumping up and down on the inside. I turned back around to finish up my business. When I went to retrieve my receipt all the doors on the Hummer flew open and a bunch of dudes got out yelling and screaming. I couldn't really hear what they were saying. A couple guys ran out of the store carrying Redbulls and Swisha Sweets.


One guy who had to be at least 5'4 ran up to the guys at the Hummer. "Yo man what the fuck you want?!"


"Yeah, didn't we teach dat ass a lesson when we popped ya homeboy?!" this coming from the driver of the Buick; who was now in the face of the passenger of the Hummer.


I knew it was time to get the hell out of dodge. I hurried up and got my ass back in the car. That's when I heard the shots go off. I started my car and tried to speed away from the pump when I heard screaming. I had to pass by the dudes to get onto the street. I sped by as quickly as I could, and I saw 2 bodies laid out on the ground. One of them was the short dude that I heard speak first. I was almost past them when the driver's side door of the Hummer flew open and a guy tried to jump in front of my car. I got past him though; knocking him down. I saw sparks flying from the side of the light pole so I knew they were shooting at me. I instantly started to pray that nobody would follow me. I knew it was bad to think what I was thinking, but I hoped they just all killed each other and forgot all about me. I fumbled for my phone to call her back, not even wanting to call 911. I didn’t to be involved in that shit AT ALL. I was so nervous I dropped my phone on the floor of my car. SHIT! I was scared, but I kept driving. I cried and prayed all the way to her house; checking my rear view mirror every 2 seconds.


I made it through her apartment gates and swung my car in the first spot I saw. I was over the lines, basically taking up two spaces, but I didn't care. I ran up to her apartment and used the key that I had to enter. I fell out on the floor and she came into the living room not knowing what kind of mindset I was in. She could see that I had been crying and got down on the floor with me. I told her everything. We both prayed and thanked God that I got out of that situation alive. Anything could've happened. It's happened to innocent people so many times before.


We stayed up all night, because I couldn't sleep. I saw the story on Channel 2 news a few hours later. here was a 5 man body count; one of them being the cashier of the station. There was only one vehicle left on the scene; it was the Hummer. I called everybody that I knew to tell them what happened to me. I was so terrified, I didn't even want to leave her house. I had to though. My mother wanted me to come home to see her and my father. I kissed her goodbye and said I would be back soon. I got outside and noticed that my car was gone. I'd been towed for taking up those two spaces.


FACT OR FICTION???