PCD posted a blog asking which movie we wished we could star in, and at this point in time that I wish I were Adam Sandler in the movie Click. I would take that special remote and rewind to the beginning of my 3 day weekend; which began Thursday night and ended just hours before having to get up this morning for work. Family, food, movies, friends, parties, liquor, sex and sleep. Can't beat that.
Thursday I opted against letting go of a possible good friendship. I believe this is a test for me and I almost failed. My temper got the best of me and I faulted that person for being who they were. That's not a good look and I checked myself. When I get so use to people acting a certain way with me and around me; I don't know how to act when someone comes into the picture and acts the exact opposite. Should I fault them for that? Who said that they had to live by the manual that I wrote? Nobody. Does this make me want this person more? Hell yeah, loll. However, she is suffering from an extreme case of "The Turtle Syndrome". She's in this I've-been-hurt-bitch-back-the-hell-up shell. She's "tight like Chinese connection"! We're both on this, let things flow as they are kick, but I'm sure that if things play out correctly then one of us will have to put up some effort and contribute some energy. I don't even want to think about that though. I have lost count on how many times I've contributed energy and false hope into worthless females. I'm not really trying to go there again. I can say now that I understand where this woman is coming from and how she operates, so I'll let her do just that. We can kick it whenever. I haven't spoken to her all weekend, because she was out of town. I told her to call me when she got back into town if she wanted to. We'll see if she does. In the meantime, I'll try not to look at the clock.
Aquarius - July 7, 2008
As usual, you are able to float with the odd and wonderful circumstances that come up in your life, dear Aquarius. However, make sure that instead of just going along passively with the prevailing energy of the day, that you actually take an active part in it. Join in the dance instead of just sitting back and watching it. You will have much more fun than if you were to just on the sidelines.
Someone told me the other day to not be a wallflower. I didn't know how to take that comment, loll. Then I thought about it. I do tend to sit back and peep the scene a lot. Do I feel like I miss out on a lot because of this? Sometimes. Then again, I have dodged many stray bullets because of this as well. I do not jump head first into any situation. I analyze everything from top to bottom; side to side before joining in the festivities or what have you. I believe I get this from both of my parents. They are very cautious people. My mother is a worrier and my father is thinker and planner. Mr. "I always have my shit together", loll. Both parents being extremely logical people. I took on all of these traits and have multiplied them times 10. These make up my best qualities and also my worse qualities. I am my own worse enemy, as many of us are. So in order for me not to be that wallflower, I must psyche myself out. That's not always the easiest thing to do. I succeeded in this task over the weekend though, and let's just say; some things popped off that really didn't need to be popped off. I still dodged the bullets though, so I'll look at that as being the bright side.
Now here I am back at work and still not thrilled about it. I anticipate this to be a good week for me though. I'm remaining pretty positive in my thinking, I'm happy and living life fabulously. I'm comfortable here on the wall checking out the scenery. Some may call me fearful, others may call me smart. I'll have some to label me as boring and other who'll label me as the bold mental assassin (wait maybe I'm the only one who calls myself that, loll!). Either way, I'm going to remain being the wallflower I am. Can't nobody tell me anything. I'm the freshest muthafuckin' wallflower you've ever seen.
Thursday I opted against letting go of a possible good friendship. I believe this is a test for me and I almost failed. My temper got the best of me and I faulted that person for being who they were. That's not a good look and I checked myself. When I get so use to people acting a certain way with me and around me; I don't know how to act when someone comes into the picture and acts the exact opposite. Should I fault them for that? Who said that they had to live by the manual that I wrote? Nobody. Does this make me want this person more? Hell yeah, loll. However, she is suffering from an extreme case of "The Turtle Syndrome". She's in this I've-been-hurt-bitch-back-the-hell-up shell. She's "tight like Chinese connection"! We're both on this, let things flow as they are kick, but I'm sure that if things play out correctly then one of us will have to put up some effort and contribute some energy. I don't even want to think about that though. I have lost count on how many times I've contributed energy and false hope into worthless females. I'm not really trying to go there again. I can say now that I understand where this woman is coming from and how she operates, so I'll let her do just that. We can kick it whenever. I haven't spoken to her all weekend, because she was out of town. I told her to call me when she got back into town if she wanted to. We'll see if she does. In the meantime, I'll try not to look at the clock.
As usual, you are able to float with the odd and wonderful circumstances that come up in your life, dear Aquarius. However, make sure that instead of just going along passively with the prevailing energy of the day, that you actually take an active part in it. Join in the dance instead of just sitting back and watching it. You will have much more fun than if you were to just on the sidelines.
Someone told me the other day to not be a wallflower. I didn't know how to take that comment, loll. Then I thought about it. I do tend to sit back and peep the scene a lot. Do I feel like I miss out on a lot because of this? Sometimes. Then again, I have dodged many stray bullets because of this as well. I do not jump head first into any situation. I analyze everything from top to bottom; side to side before joining in the festivities or what have you. I believe I get this from both of my parents. They are very cautious people. My mother is a worrier and my father is thinker and planner. Mr. "I always have my shit together", loll. Both parents being extremely logical people. I took on all of these traits and have multiplied them times 10. These make up my best qualities and also my worse qualities. I am my own worse enemy, as many of us are. So in order for me not to be that wallflower, I must psyche myself out. That's not always the easiest thing to do. I succeeded in this task over the weekend though, and let's just say; some things popped off that really didn't need to be popped off. I still dodged the bullets though, so I'll look at that as being the bright side.
Now here I am back at work and still not thrilled about it. I anticipate this to be a good week for me though. I'm remaining pretty positive in my thinking, I'm happy and living life fabulously. I'm comfortable here on the wall checking out the scenery. Some may call me fearful, others may call me smart. I'll have some to label me as boring and other who'll label me as the bold mental assassin (wait maybe I'm the only one who calls myself that, loll!). Either way, I'm going to remain being the wallflower I am. Can't nobody tell me anything. I'm the freshest muthafuckin' wallflower you've ever seen.
Me and my big sister decided to finally go see wanted Thursday night. I was anticipating this movie for so long. I am a sucker for action and sexy women playing the role of bad girls.Cast
James McAvoy - Wes Gibson
Morgan Freeman - Sloan
Angelina Jolie - Fox
Terence Stamp - Pekwar
Thomas Kretschmann
&
Common - The Gunsmith
I don't think any other woman could've played this role like Angelina. I haven't kept up with all of her movies, but she seems to look the same in all of them for the most part. Besides Tomb Raider; she finally snagged another role to fit her. The woman has mad sex appeal. Women and men; gay or straight recognize this.
The special effects sort of reminded me of the Matrix. Who didn't love the special effects in that movie? Some things looked a little faked and extremely animated, but they were good nonetheless. Thoroughly I enjoyed the movie and I would actually go to see it again. If you're really not into action and killing; you won't like the movie. Check it out anyway.
A Fraternity of Assassins
T. Nicole rates this movie with 4 stars!
This day isn't going as bad as I thought it might. I'm still anticipating people giving me crap loads of work at the last minute though. I couldn't miss out on the C-Dub post. So welcome to College Wednesday; where we summarize 99% of the people you'll ever meet in college or in life. This week we introduce the Guy/Girl with Inhuman Halo Skills and The Hertic.
Heretic - Exact opposite of The Converter, this person hates all forms of Religion and despises God. used to be devoted to a faith, but lost his or her faith through some event int eh past, such as a major physical/psychological trauma. This person loves to quote John Milton, and argue with others who believe in God. I can't say I know many atheists, but I will say the ones I came across accidentally led to a very awkward situation. I mean any and everything I said that related back to a higher power was shut down by their dark and evil spirit. "THERE IS NO GOD!" "WE WERE ALL LEFT HERE TO DIE" "DEATH IS POWER" Wtf? These are examples of conversations you leave with the quickness. Have Mercy! "MERCY IS IN THE HANDS OF SATAN" Man what?! I mean I'm not one to knock a person for what they believe in or what they don't believe in. I just don't want to be struck down in the process of accepting you for who you are. Feel me? I know that won't happen though, because God loves all his children; even the non-believers. He is that kinda dude. So he wouldn't strike me down just by association. You have to be one DEEP individual to come up with theories that God does not exist. You are above and beyond....stupid? Loll, not let me not go there. I'm not feeling organized religion now days myself, but I do and always will believe in The True God Above and His Son. They get me through all of my days and this is greatly appreciated. So keep your blank pamphlets. I've made my choice and I'm sticking with it.
Alright lunch time is over and I must get back to work. I'd much rather be playing The Sims 2 ;] See ya'll next week.
Okay, if you're like me; you have no idea what Halo is right? Well, it's a video game of course. I have never played it nor do I have the desire to play it. But we all know at least one video game fanatic. I mean they are addicted! They will literally play all night long. Do they go to work? Yes, but they will head straight home to beat the next round of whatever game they're playing. I'm not going to lie, I was like this with two games. That was The SIMS & Grand Theft Auto! I could not be pulled away from these games. Once I kicked the addiction, I vowed never to pick up another PS2 controller in my life, loll. My skills were beyond mad. I was the SHIT on both of these games. So I can't even be mad at The Guy/Girl With Inhuman Halo Skills; play on player.
Heretic - Exact opposite of The Converter, this person hates all forms of Religion and despises God. used to be devoted to a faith, but lost his or her faith through some event int eh past, such as a major physical/psychological trauma. This person loves to quote John Milton, and argue with others who believe in God. I can't say I know many atheists, but I will say the ones I came across accidentally led to a very awkward situation. I mean any and everything I said that related back to a higher power was shut down by their dark and evil spirit. "THERE IS NO GOD!" "WE WERE ALL LEFT HERE TO DIE" "DEATH IS POWER" Wtf? These are examples of conversations you leave with the quickness. Have Mercy! "MERCY IS IN THE HANDS OF SATAN" Man what?! I mean I'm not one to knock a person for what they believe in or what they don't believe in. I just don't want to be struck down in the process of accepting you for who you are. Feel me? I know that won't happen though, because God loves all his children; even the non-believers. He is that kinda dude. So he wouldn't strike me down just by association. You have to be one DEEP individual to come up with theories that God does not exist. You are above and beyond....stupid? Loll, not let me not go there. I'm not feeling organized religion now days myself, but I do and always will believe in The True God Above and His Son. They get me through all of my days and this is greatly appreciated. So keep your blank pamphlets. I've made my choice and I'm sticking with it.Alright lunch time is over and I must get back to work. I'd much rather be playing The Sims 2 ;] See ya'll next week.
It is definitely crunch time here in the office today. For some strange reason, someone had the bright idea of pushing all deadlines up to this afternoon. I'm not going to worry about it though. Breaking my neck on the job is not something I plan to do. I'll do what I can and in whatever time frame I can get it done in. If I'm not given things until the last minute, it's therefore not my problem. Talk to the people giving me shit at 11:59. They are good for that over here and I'm good for not doing it until the next day, loll. They all can kick bricks.
Wednesday, July 2, 2008
Aquarius (Jan 20 - Feb 18)
You don't want anyone questioning your ability to do your job and if your capability is being challenged now, you might just retreat into your shell. It's not that you are timid; it's just that you don't want to waste time and energy defending yourself when you could be finishing your chores and then going off to play. Avoiding emotional drama for a day or two may be the easiest way to get through any current awkwardness.
Wasting my time and energy on anything is a big problem for me. It takes quite a while for me to find worth in people to place my loyalty in. I've become the queen of moving the hell on in my older years. There really isn't enough time in my day to linger around people I know won't make the cut. I know if you will make it or not probably after one brief conversation. I try not to judge though. This is where I begin to give people the benefit of the doubt. This is where I become silent so that all of my assumptions can be proven wrong. Shut me down; please! This rarely happens though. Some people surprise me though. Their game is stepped up tremendously or I read them all wrong. Needless to say, those people are still in my circle. They are still apart of my network. Being in my world is not for the weak hearted or the weak minded. Either you got it or you don't.
Yesterday I wrote a blog on peace and understanding. Yes my standards are pretty high and I can be fairly shallow, but to avoid disappointment and to keep the peace; I don’t expect anything from anyone. I've said it so many times before. Everyone was who they were before they stepped foot into my life. People rarely change. Most things are just disguised; quite nicely, I must say. However, if you look deep enough and listen long enough, you'll see those things being so beautifully disguised. Classic example; the other day I was talking to a young woman for the very first time. Extremely beautiful; fine than a muthafucka. She starts off by telling me she was shy and wasn't the talking girl. Less than 5 minutes later; I couldn't get her to shut up if I tried. What was she talking about? A whole lot of nothing! I jumped in this one-sided conversation and brought up the fucked up conditions of the economy and she grew silent. *crickets* Completely blowing off my attempt for a meaningful conversation; she mentioned that she didn't watch any television for various reasons and tried to stay off the internet because of weirdos. A couple minutes later she asked me about at least 7 music videos she's seen on BET and did I YouTube much. "I thought you didn't watch television." (Oh, I'm tripping BET isn't TV; it's an evil brain warp for helpless Negros, lmao). This young lady, being a proven case.
Bottom line being; people just aren't equipped with substance anymore. Nobody has anything to say anymore. All I hear is gibberish. I think I'll go against my scope though. I'm not really feeling like retreating back to my shell again. I don't plan on running into any emotional drama either, because of the peace and understanding I have within today. This can be a test for me. Do I feel a bit awkward? Hell yes. Why? Sometimes; just sometimes, it sucks being the only one of my kind in this big world.
Something has been boggling my mind the past couple of days. At what point does one stop giving people the benefit of the doubt? When is it time to say, "okay, you've had your chance to prove your worth in my life and you've failed"? We all have standards; don't front, and sadly enough everyone we encounter will not meet those standards. This is one thing I hate about meeting new people. They do and say all the right things in the very beginning. That sense of "newness" is a MOTHER. It's proof that the grass is greener in that new territory, but you find out after a couple of days or maybe even a week that they don't water that grass daily. Now it's all yellow and patchy. Ugh. "New people naturally spark interests and most are on their best behavior. If they never had it, the act won't last long." This was quoted from a friend of mine. This is so very true. If you sit and wait long enough, people's true colors will surface. They aren't that same intellectual, courteous, kind and considerate person. Their speech changes, their tone changes, most things spoken of in the very beginning are never heard of again, no more "how was your day?", no more "good morning", no more 2 hour conversations. Silence has taken over. What a bummer.
Wednesday, July 2, 2008
Aquarius (Jan 20 - Feb 18)
You don't want anyone questioning your ability to do your job and if your capability is being challenged now, you might just retreat into your shell. It's not that you are timid; it's just that you don't want to waste time and energy defending yourself when you could be finishing your chores and then going off to play. Avoiding emotional drama for a day or two may be the easiest way to get through any current awkwardness.
Wasting my time and energy on anything is a big problem for me. It takes quite a while for me to find worth in people to place my loyalty in. I've become the queen of moving the hell on in my older years. There really isn't enough time in my day to linger around people I know won't make the cut. I know if you will make it or not probably after one brief conversation. I try not to judge though. This is where I begin to give people the benefit of the doubt. This is where I become silent so that all of my assumptions can be proven wrong. Shut me down; please! This rarely happens though. Some people surprise me though. Their game is stepped up tremendously or I read them all wrong. Needless to say, those people are still in my circle. They are still apart of my network. Being in my world is not for the weak hearted or the weak minded. Either you got it or you don't.
Yesterday I wrote a blog on peace and understanding. Yes my standards are pretty high and I can be fairly shallow, but to avoid disappointment and to keep the peace; I don’t expect anything from anyone. I've said it so many times before. Everyone was who they were before they stepped foot into my life. People rarely change. Most things are just disguised; quite nicely, I must say. However, if you look deep enough and listen long enough, you'll see those things being so beautifully disguised. Classic example; the other day I was talking to a young woman for the very first time. Extremely beautiful; fine than a muthafucka. She starts off by telling me she was shy and wasn't the talking girl. Less than 5 minutes later; I couldn't get her to shut up if I tried. What was she talking about? A whole lot of nothing! I jumped in this one-sided conversation and brought up the fucked up conditions of the economy and she grew silent. *crickets* Completely blowing off my attempt for a meaningful conversation; she mentioned that she didn't watch any television for various reasons and tried to stay off the internet because of weirdos. A couple minutes later she asked me about at least 7 music videos she's seen on BET and did I YouTube much. "I thought you didn't watch television." (Oh, I'm tripping BET isn't TV; it's an evil brain warp for helpless Negros, lmao). This young lady, being a proven case. Bottom line being; people just aren't equipped with substance anymore. Nobody has anything to say anymore. All I hear is gibberish. I think I'll go against my scope though. I'm not really feeling like retreating back to my shell again. I don't plan on running into any emotional drama either, because of the peace and understanding I have within today. This can be a test for me. Do I feel a bit awkward? Hell yes. Why? Sometimes; just sometimes, it sucks being the only one of my kind in this big world.
I can't believe how fast June flew by. Now here we are at the 1st of July. Seriously into this summer thing and it's hot. REAL FREAKIN' HOT. That's Texas for you though. I can't say that I accomplished everything that I hoped to accomplish last month, but those short term goals were not forgotten. This is the month that I will follow through. I got back on track with paying my parents back, buying things for my apartment, keeping my car maintenance up, and keeping my job performance in excellent status. Last month my focus was on solitude. Getting my mind right and taking my time out alone away from the pressures of my every day life. So this months focus goes hand in hand with last months. Mr. Albert Einstein brings us this month's quote.
"Peace cannot be kept by force. It can only be achieved by understanding." - Albert Einstein. I have always tried to keep the peace in all situations that I experience in life. For the longest time I would have these internal battles with myself because I didn't understand why I couldn't get my point across or why no one was really hearing me. Everything was always left over my head and up in the air. Everyone who knows me, knows that I HATE things being left in the air. So therefore the peace isn't kept within. I want to try an accomplish this during the month of July.
Understanding is said to be the key. I understand that life is only what I make it and I'm a peace with that. I understand that people aren't meant to be in my life forever and I'm at peace with that. I understand that everything that spills from my lips won't be agreed with and I'm at peace with that. I understand that every way that I'm stuck in isn't accepted by all and I'm at peace with that. I'm a peace with knowing that I'll forever be misunderstood. I'm at peace with understanding that my expectations of people will never be met. I want to maintain this peace by taking things just as they are. Do not force the unwilling or the impossible. Something else can be done with my time. Worrying why something isn't being done as I'd do it or why this person just said this or isn't saying that is a waste of my precious time. All major things are left in God's hands so why should I sweat the small stuff? Absorb it, understand it and become at peace with it. Facing the fact that the world can't be changed by one person and that the people in it won't change is a very important factor in peace within.
Understanding is said to be the key. I understand that life is only what I make it and I'm a peace with that. I understand that people aren't meant to be in my life forever and I'm at peace with that. I understand that everything that spills from my lips won't be agreed with and I'm at peace with that. I understand that every way that I'm stuck in isn't accepted by all and I'm at peace with that. I'm a peace with knowing that I'll forever be misunderstood. I'm at peace with understanding that my expectations of people will never be met. I want to maintain this peace by taking things just as they are. Do not force the unwilling or the impossible. Something else can be done with my time. Worrying why something isn't being done as I'd do it or why this person just said this or isn't saying that is a waste of my precious time. All major things are left in God's hands so why should I sweat the small stuff? Absorb it, understand it and become at peace with it. Facing the fact that the world can't be changed by one person and that the people in it won't change is a very important factor in peace within.
I've witnessed so many bad situations occur because of misunderstandings. It's true that now days people aren't even trying to understand. Their ignorance is bliss. They speak without listening to what has already been said and what is being said. They hear no one but themselves. Ever been the victim of a one-sided conversation? This happens to me all the time. Either I'm cut off for bullshit or I'm totally dismissed for something that they feel is more important than what I just said. Who really cares about me outside of my family? Who really wants to listen to what I have to say? Why do I grant everyone with the opprotunity to be heard before my words are spoken? Who knows, but hey, I do understand that the majority of the world is self-centered and ignorant and I'm at peace with that. Deuces.
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